We recently asked members of the BuzzFeed Community to share the weirdest thing they ever did as a kid, and — LOL — these knuckleheads did some really, really weird things:
1. "When I was 5 or so, my grandma had those Dixie cups you use for mouthwash. Whenever I visited her home, I'd see how many cups I could fill with my poo and then flush the evidence."
2. "I’d collect dead bumblebees that I’d find and treat them like pets until their heads fell off."
3. "I wore skirts that I made out of duct tape and candy wrappers. This one has index cards on it too. I didn't have many friends, but I sure was interesting."
4. "I named my stuffed animals after the noises I heard my parents make during sex."
5. "I had a bizarre obsession with the Pillsbury Dough Boy. Every time we had a Pillsbury product, I made my mom cut out the Dough Boy on the packaging."
6. "From ages 2-4, I gagged myself constantly — I just straight up stuck my finger down my throat. I never threw up, I just liked the sensation of my throat constricting on its own."
7. "I used to chew on the feet of my Barbie dolls. The rubber had a satisfying texture and eventually all the barbies had mangled stumps at the ends of their legs."
8. "This is kinda disgusting, but I used to bite my toenails. I was really flexible growing up, so I'd go into contortionist mode and bite my toenails."
9. "I would pick up snails and peel off their shell, then give the naked snail to my mom as a gift."
10. "I couldn't have an actual pet as a kid, so I filled a plastic bag with water and pretended it was my pet. I made it a little nest in my desk drawer, and would hold it and 'pet' it."
11. "My sister and I used to pretend that the round tortilla chips were the eucharist. My sister would give me a chip and say, 'The body of Christ,' and I'd have to accept it, then make the sign of the cross as I ate it."
12. "I used to cut the soft buttons off the remotes in the house. I'll never forget the look my mom gave me when she saw it and asked if I was okay."
13. "If I met anyone, and I mean ANYONE, I would immediately ask them, 'Do you like salad?'”
14. "I used to put rocks in my mouth. I wouldn't swallow them thank goodness, I just liked the way they felt in my mouth."
15. "Janet Jackson was not only my invisible friend, but I'd force my parents to ensure she had a seat at our table for every meal. Even when we went to a restaurant, there had to be a chair for Janet."
16. "My mom used to watch The Bold and the Beautiful and I guess I picked it up because I used act out my own soap opera with crayons. The biggest scandal was when Pink cheated on Blue with Green."
17. "When I was like 6 or 7 I was too afraid to go to the bathroom at night so I snuck into the living room and peed in a can."
18. "I 'breastfed' my fucking TEDDY BEAR. I literally took my shirt off and pretended he was drinking my imaginary breast milk. Smokey, if you ever read this, I’m so sorry for everything I put you through."
19. "My mom caught 5-year-old me making out with one of those Ronald McDonald bench statues, tongue out and everything."
20. "I would walk my 'pet mouse.' I had a computer mouse that I would drag around by the cable. This lasted for more years than I care to admit."
21. "I used to cut up my stuffed animals and hide them in a bag in my closet. I was scared my parents would find the bag, so I was trying to figure out how and where to get rid of it. I felt like I was hiding a body."
22. "I thought my life was like The Truman Show and that everything I did was being watched and recorded. I never let on that I thought this, but whenever I was alone I'd pose for the 'camera' and act as weird as possible, trying to confuse whoever it was that was watching and studying me."
23. "I used to pee on the carpet in our living room and blame it on the dog. I still feel so bad about it to this day. Poor Micky didn’t deserve it."
All of us right now:
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Submissions have been edited for length and clarity.
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