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1. When you watch Cake Boss and you've become overly confident that you've picked up a few things after watching a few episodes:
2. When you hear someone say "pianist", but you actually hear the word "penis":
3. When you bring your dusty but trusty N64 to game night:
4. When you strike up a conversation with a teenager, thinking that you have a firm grasp of today's slang:
5. When you're frustrated with how often the toilet seats at work are coated with urine:
6. What you tell yourself every single time you make the decision to start exercising and eating healthy:
7. Then without hesitation, today becomes your cheat day as soon as delicious obstacles present themselves:
8. Then your cheat day was so glorious that no amount of exercise or healthy eating can help your cause now:
9. When the guy in charge of the grill denies burning the chicken wings:
10. When somebody touches your computer screen with their disgusting fingers:
11. When you're in a hurry and the only parking spaces left are the ones that are reserved for pregnant women:
12. When you accidentally send a flirty selfie meant for your crush to a friend on Snapchat:
13. When you're signing up for a new account and one of your friends suggests a clever username:
14. When you walk out of a barbershop with a disappointing haircut from a different barber than your usual:
15. When you diffuse an argument with your short attention span:
16. Anytime bae texts "K":
17. When your birthday is coming up and you receive a bunch of birthday cards with cash from each of your aunts and uncles:
18. When your BFF catches you jamming out to Justin Bieber and asks you if you're seriously still into his music:
19. When your computer stops responding and you're on the brink of force quitting every window to remedy the situation:
20. When your friends really want to know how you finished reading Game of Thrones so quickly:
21. When you offer relationship advice to a sobbing friend and they lash out at you for not understanding what they're going through because you're single:
22. When you have a splinter too deep for tweezers to pull out:
23. When you and your buddies go out drinking and you end up becoming the least wasted one of the group:
24. When you spend your Friday nights at home perusing the hundreds of photos of couples on your Facebook newsfeed:
25. Then you start to long for those Friday nights as things get pretty serious between you and your new beau:
26. That moment when you feel so old that you have words of wisdom for people who are just 2 years younger than you:
27. Your life motto:
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