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We hope you love the products we recommend! Just so you know, BuzzFeed may collect a share of sales or other compensation from the links on this page. Oh, and FYI — prices are accurate and items in stock as of time of publication.
1. A ~zero gravity~ indoor lounge chair so you can pretend you're sunning by the pool instead of being just at home watching Lost for the 100th time. Damn, even *that* island looks pretty good right about now.
2. A gradual self-tanning kit (aka you'll look naturally glowing, not overnight orange). Get ready for your friends to check out your legs and ask, "Wait, did you go away for the weekend and not invite me??"
3. A margarita (and other frozen treat) maker that'll shave the ice and ~then~ blend the ingredients for a perfectly smooth (and never chunky) beverage.
4. A miniature sandbox for your desk, complete with chair, umbrella, and sand castle–making accessories. Because you need to "get away," especially when compiling those dang expense reports.
5. A bottle of OGX's Moroccan sea salt spray, a paraben-free texturizer made with kelp, argan oil, and sea salt (duh), to add shine and body while creating mermaid-quality waves even if you're hundreds of miles from the ocean.
6. Or a Bed Head ~Wave Artist~ curling iron that'll create a "Don't I look so tousled and cool" hairstyle in no time flat.
7. A charming little dish shaped like one of those all-over-Instagram unicorn pool floaties. Use it to hold your rings, snacks, or all your hopes and dreams that you, too, will enjoy being in the water once more. Someday.
8. A tropical-themed beer bong you're flamin-going to enjoy long after your days of college parties on the beach are over and done with.
9. A straw hat embroidered with a variety of cheeky sayings, because even if you're not in the glaring sun of some island, you're all about that shade.
10. A six pack of Angry Orchard's brand new rosé cider (exsqueese me, rosé season is year-round). You don't need to be sitting on a fancy rooftop bar to enjoy!
11. A shower curtain printed with a palm tree scene straight out of a five-star resort brochure. Crank up that hot water, fill your bathroom with steam, and pretend you're in paradise.
12. A Sipcaddy that'll suction cup right to your bathroom wall so you can enjoy an ice-cold brew while you get clean. Nothing says "enjoying some me time" like a shower beer.
13. A not-sarcastic-at-all-no-way towel so you can dry off your bod and your sense of humor as you freeze after emerging from the shower. Why the eff are bathroom tiles the coldest things in the known universe?
14. A jar of coconut, avocado, and shea-infused whipped body butter that'll moisturize your skin AND transport you to your happy place, drinking on the sand. It's a win win.
15. A palm leaf–printed kimono cardigan sure to remind you of tropical days, while adding a breezy layer in your air-conditioned-even-in-winter office.
16. A stretchy metallic headband that'll outlast any real flower crown you could ever want. Meaning you can still wear it after this Elsa-level eternal winter ends.
17. A cozy cropped sweatshirt reading "Dont worry, beach happy" — it's great for those summer evenings when the wind starts to kick up off the water.... or just wearing now because it's March and it's still cold out side.
18. A set of pink Himalayan salt glasses for effortless tequila shots at home — no need to reach for a pinch of Morton's!
19. A frozen drink luge to keep your booze chilled and your parties hot — you'll wish this was the *only* ice in your life right now.
20. A set of faux monstera or palm leaves you can stick in a cheap vase — your drab apartment will look like the lobby of a swanky tropical hotel!
21. A metallic silver fanny pack, because honestly carrying things around in your hand or in a purse is inconvenient!! Spring break college style = practical; don't resist.
22. A pair of geometric, tinted sunnies so you'll only see blue skies ahead. Rose-colored glasses only wish they could.
23. A recipe book containing 200 cocktail concoctions guaranteed to whisk you away to white sand beaches — or at least, you'll *think* you're there. Can you say "Oh my (tai)!"
24. A copper-colored pineapple tumbler to serve up your ~punchiest~ tropical beverages.
25. And a pack of 288(!) drink umbrellas for that all-important garnish. These > your actual umbrella, which is currently covered in that dreaded thing called "wintry mix."
26. An underwater LED bath light so your bathtub seems more like a *hot tub*. ::Disco mode engaged::
27. An adorable gingham sundress you won't be able to wait for summer to wear — just pair it with booties and a chunky sweater now!
28. An umbrella that'll quickly become the only one you want to use — whenever you do, just look *up* and you'll see blue skies ahead!
29. And a scented candle inspired by memories of those lovely vacations at that seaside cottage. Or, if you have never stayed at one, now you can pretend you have.
Beach please (send me someplace warm)!
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