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    Jun 5, 2014

    The Only 28 Times It's Completely Valid To Dial 911

    Lack of McNuggets ARE an emergency.

    1. Because of Blockbuster:

    2. Because you weren't finished with that beer:

    3. For burgers and weed:

    4. Because you are actually in the afterlife:

    5. For Mcnuggets:

    6. For that erectile problem:

    7. Because your mom is using the car right now:

    8. For a husband:

    9. Because your sandwich order was not fulfilled:

    10. Because of an angry cat:

    11. Because of lame-o neighbors:

    12. Because you're getting swindled:

    13. Because grandma needs her beer:

    14. Because there's a full moon out:

    15. Because you can't sleep next to that noise:

    16. To get those damn hooligans off the street:

    17. Because the waffles were raw:

    18. For sex:

    19. Because math homework is hard:

    20. Because you wanted a WESTERN burger:

    21. Because you didn't ask for that marinara crap:

    22. To get the time:

    23. To let everyone know the truth about Kelly Ripa:

    24. Because the bus stop is just too far:

    25. Because you've forgotten how to cook a turkey:

    26. Because of those damn broken zippers:

    27. SPIDERS.

    28. And for love.

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