Buzz·Posted on Dec 9, 201850 Therapy Tweets From 2018 That Are Funny As Hell"I Ghosted My Therapist After Crying In Her Office: A Memoir"by by Lara ParkerBuzzFeed Staff, by Pablo ValdiviaBuzzFeed StaffLinkFacebookPinterestTwitterMail 1. bubba's mittens 🐙🧤❄☃️🎄🍭 @HyFiology trying to apply what your therapist says 06:41 PM - 14 Aug 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 2. Erica Rhodes @ericarhodes I love watching my therapist try to pretend he knows who I'm talking about when clearly he's forgotten the whole backstory. 01:40 AM - 18 Mar 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 3. Pitch @pitchjokes ME: I just feel like “pizza party” should refer to pizzas having a party. Humans having pizza at a party should just be a party with pizza. Does that make sense to you? THERAPIST: I think we should meet more often 12:02 AM - 13 Mar 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 4. anna ho ho horges @annabroges therapist: why don’t you tell people when they hurt you instead of pushing them away without an opportunity to show you if they care enough about you to change their behavior me: https://t.co/wXlB5IEFt2 09:50 PM - 15 Feb 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 5. Octopus/Caveman @OctopusCaveman Therapist: Your mother is so overprotective she is the cause of your issues connecting to women emotionally Me: Well yo mama so stupid she tried to climb Mountain Dew 08:46 PM - 23 Aug 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 6. Alicia @nerdjpg My therapist: so did you try those new coping mechanisms I told you about? Me: 05:47 PM - 16 Mar 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 7. Kirsten King @KirstenKing_ Therapist: I’ll see you next Monday? Me: For sure. Therapist: Okay, talk then. *leaves office* *two minutes pass* *opens phone and texts therapist: should I get bangs?* 06:57 AM - 04 Dec 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 8. Alex, but online @Alex_but_online Therapist: Bottling up negative emotions is bad for your health Me:[finger guns] That’s why I also bottle up the positive ones 09:54 PM - 13 Mar 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 9. Rachel Whitehurst @RachLWhitehurst my therapist: what’s on your mind? my brain: https://t.co/9cN7mWc3o6 06:33 PM - 14 Mar 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 10. Leslie Grossman @MissLeslieG If I cover myself with 10 weighted blankets at all times can I finally stop going to therapy 09:39 PM - 25 Nov 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 11. 𝔞 𝔰𝔞𝔡 𝔟𝔦𝔱𝔠𝔥 🌙 @sadcherrybitch Therapist: Let’s talk about your treatment and self care plan Me: Face... mask Therapist: That’s not a legitimate form of- Me: ʞsɐɯ ǝɔɐℲ Therapist: We talked about this it’s a distraction that feeds off consumerism and the internalized value of appearance Me: ʄǟƈɛ ʍǟֆӄ :) 07:51 PM - 04 Dec 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 12. Abby Govindan @abbygov therapist: you have PTSD me: hell yeah I have PTSD: Proficient Talent for Sucking DICK lmao therapist: maybe we can talk about your use of humor as an unhealthy coping mechanism for the trauma you’ve experienced me: Sheryl, I don’t think you understand how clever that joke was 07:43 PM - 27 Aug 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 13. Frank’s RedHot Ocean @OfficialBrohoss me to my therapist: so i told everyone at brunch, "that baby has TERF bangs" and i tweeted about it afterward and it did pretty well it got like 20-something likes i think my therapist: *writing "INSANE ????????" on notepad* 03:01 PM - 14 Mar 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 14. TiffanyTrumpVEVO @Johnatron4000 Me en route to therapy: I don't think I have anything to talk about. Maybe I should stop going Me, at therapy: 06:05 PM - 13 Mar 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 15. Alanna Okun @alanna love to pretend that my therapist is waiting eagerly for updates on all my dumb shit 11:11 PM - 13 Feb 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 16. alana has really bad pcd :( @mammaparrilla my therapist: so what has been your coping mechanism so far? me: 02:21 AM - 20 Aug 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 17. Jasmyn Lawson @JasmynBeKnowing My therapist is going to be shook tomorrow. Her: What’s new? Me: 02:46 AM - 10 Feb 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 18. Dani Fernandez @msdanifernandez Therapist: so you asked him out Me: well no, but see yesterday he liked my photo and today I liked his photo and then he rt’d my tweet and Therapist: I cant handle this 06:51 PM - 18 Feb 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 19. lui @peterparkered me: cant wait to bring this up in therapy later *later in therapy* therapist: how are you doing? me: im doing great! haha im so great what’s up with u? u good too? nice 07:33 AM - 17 Feb 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 20. Headless horse, man @HlessHman Therapist: what's wrong Me: what if we spend our whole lives not believing in ghosts just to become a ghost that we desperately want someone to believe in Therapist: *schedules an appointment with another therapist* 02:17 AM - 16 Feb 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 21. www.creedthoughts.gov.www\creedthoughts. @sogodly_ Trying to be honest with my therapist but not so honest that I get involuntarily hospitalized 04:12 AM - 15 Mar 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 22. Jessica Danielle 💋 @ohnoitsjessicaa me: I’ve conquered my fear of ghosts therapist: that’s the spirit me: oh fuck where 02:38 AM - 03 Dec 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 23. logan 🍒 @deathlylogan me talking to my therapist 02:31 AM - 10 Mar 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 24. pau🌺 @SrtaPCA me telling my therapist all my traumas and how wrong my life is going vs me making jokes about that traumas and ignoring them. 04:37 PM - 03 Dec 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 25. El Sabroso @Effsesays My therapist: I'm going to try something a little different this session 10:38 AM - 17 Mar 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 26. festive gay tweets @urdadssidepiece My therapist when I start yet another session with “so there’s this new guy...” 08:38 PM - 14 Mar 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 27. lee @punkcorgi I Ghosted My Therapist After Crying In Her Office: A Memoir 09:54 PM - 16 Mar 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 28. kelly ? @en_hahaha my therapist: me: god ur so good at this job 12:30 AM - 04 Dec 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 29. Caroline Moss @CarolineMoss Me: I used to get joy from twitter but now it makes me upset. Therapist: what if you just didn’t use it anymore? Me: not sure I understand 06:53 PM - 16 Oct 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 30. Frank’s RedHot Ocean @OfficialBrohoss me to my therapist: so i told everyone at brunch, "that baby has TERF bangs" and i tweeted about it afterward and it did pretty well it got like 20-something likes i think my therapist: *writing "INSANE ????????" on notepad* 03:01 PM - 14 Mar 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 31. poetic kate @poetickate me, showing my therapist my twitter 06:26 PM - 15 Mar 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 32. Darla @ddsmidt Therapist: It seems like you have a problem with projecting your feelings onto others. Me: No, I don’t. You’re the one with the problem. 07:58 PM - 10 Mar 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 33. b @boujeesIut my therapist: are you sad? me: 03:37 AM - 05 Dec 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 34. roxane gay's nemesis @phillipethao Not being honest with my therapist https://t.co/jvaGErSYOI 07:24 PM - 06 Dec 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 35. Karen Kilgariff @KarenKilgariff I made my therapist cry today you have to admit that's hot 08:09 PM - 17 May 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite 36. Elly “Gay Goth Martha Stewart” Belle 🔮 @literElly my therapist: so how are you? me: https://t.co/w7FEmlKuYl 06:49 PM - 06 Dec 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 37. Matthew Prebeg 🅴 @mattprebeg my therapist: me: do you think i’m annoying be honest 03:45 AM - 04 Dec 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 38. dirt prince ⚫️ @pants_leg my therapist: so how are you today? me: welp that’s enough therapy for the week 03:39 AM - 06 Dec 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 39. Seasonal but Slutty 1984’s George Whorewell🖋 @EwdatsGROSS My therapist: so how are you? Fill me on about what’s going on it your life:) Me: 02:20 PM - 28 Nov 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 40. hot bot @shitlynn my therapist: hmmmmm. (thoughtful pause) what if you didn't do that? me: 😧🤯 03:54 PM - 05 Dec 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 41. jenny craigslist @STORMlJENNER i can’t even complain about therapy not working bc i never listen to any of my therapist’s advice 05:21 PM - 06 Dec 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 42. Tara Mae Lou Who 🤶 @taramae72 One day it was like I just woke up, and Bugles wouldn't fit on my fingertips anymore. So I had to eat them like a grown-up. Therapist: ... 02:47 PM - 05 Dec 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 43. Michael Benjamin @mfbenji My therapist once I lost my health insurance 05:34 PM - 04 Dec 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 44. the x files ! @scullyxf when my therapist points out my unhealthy habits 07:01 PM - 05 Dec 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 45. D @got_red_on_you_ I came back to Twitter for the humor, or as my therapist calls it, "reliving my trauma". 04:20 PM - 05 Dec 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 46. Margaret 🍁 @MagsMalott me after telling my therapist i’m happy and that i’m doing alright 02:41 AM - 06 Dec 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 47. 🦋 @jeonghwas my therapist to me at the end of the session 05:13 AM - 05 Dec 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 48. rob is officially old. 🧓🏻🐝 @actualhuman01 me: i hate everything and want to die him: we all hate everything and want to die, you're not special me: wow ok you're a terrible therapist him: dude i'm not your therapist and my manager says i can't sell you "as many big macs as we can possibly make" 06:28 PM - 04 Dec 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 49. Kendra ⚔️ @kendrawcandraw My therapist: Why do you think that is? Me: 10:52 PM - 04 Dec 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite 50. Jerry @Jerrypleasure therapist: u need to find yourself waldo: ᶠᵘᶜᵏ 01:47 AM - 04 Dec 2018 Reply Retweet Favorite