29 Men Who, At Minimum, Need Therapy And, At Maximum, Need To Log Off

    "The way you say hi is cathartic, like the dew on the soft grass at dawn."

    by
    Lara Parker
    by Lara Parker

    BuzzFeed Staff

    ,
    Pablo Valdivia
    by Pablo Valdivia

    BuzzFeed Staff

    Hello, people of the world — Lara and Pablo at your service. We're here today to make sure you know about an Instagram account that is too perfect for words: beam_me_up_softboi.

    beam_me_up_softboi

    It is an account solely dedicated to posting screenshots of messages from Soft Bois™. If you don't know what a Soft Boi™ is, just know that they're basically men who pretend to have a sensitive, "artsy" side, but will then say that your music taste sucks, you don't understand basic parts of life, and get angry if you don't wanna prove that you actually *have* seen a Wes Anderson movie before.

    CW

    1. This is...a lot.

    2. LMAO, what???

    3. "Pleasent" chaotic energy really is a vibe.

    4. I mean, yes, but also...calm down?

    5. I just...

    6. He could've probably just made this one cohesive thought but whatever, I guess.

    7. What is "physcotic" though?

    8. Well, that escalated quickly.

    9. Oh, for the love of god.

    10. You're right — this is stupid.

    11. Oh, cool.

    12. Are men OK?

    13. "hahaha"

    14. Conflicting emotions is one way to describe it.

    15. Please shut the fuck up.

    16. Excuse me?

    17. Oh, we got a ~different~ boy here, everyone!

    18. He made an earring...out. of. his. tooth.

    20. But honestly, who raised him?

    21. Pardon?

    22. Haha, I hate this so much.

    23. Oh, all right.

    24. Gonna have to go with...no.

    25. Some news: I will never be able to hear or look at the word "slurp" again in the same way.

    26. He ~sensed~ her.

    27. Good for you.

    28. This is getting out of hand.

    29. *throws my phone away*

    If you wanna see more Soft Bois doing the absolute most, check out beam_me_up_softboi on Instagram immediately.