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To Everyone Who Pinches People On St. Patrick's Day

Don't touch me.

Posted on

Yeah, that's right. Someone decided that it was so unacceptable that you neglected to wear green on this **holiday, that they not only point it out to you, but they PINCH YOU.

Screen Gems

**Holiday is a loose term considering we all still have to go to work, AHEM.


Dear Everyone Who Pinches People Who Aren't Wearing Green,

What the hell is wrong with you? Did you ever think that maybe I don't own green? Did you ever consider that maybe I'm not Irish and don't even celebrate this day? DID IT OCCUR TO YOU THAT MAYBE GREEN DOES NOT LOOK GOOD WITH MY SKIN TONE??? Did you ever think, "hey maybe I won't touch someone without first getting their permission?"

I hope you have learned your lesson. And the next time you consider pinching someone, consider this; payback is a bitch.