kristallon

Kristen Tallon

Kristen Tallon is a Chicago-based writer, actor and improviser. Kristen has studied at The Second City Conservatory, The Second City Writing Program, the iO Theater and The Annoyance Theater. She is one-half of the comedy duo, Mr. Beaver. One part loud and American, one part nice and Canadian; Daiya cheese has changed her allergy-addled life.

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  • A teddy bear taking a selfie
  • A wooden post sticking out of the grass
  • A rainbow unicorn with an arrow pointing upward for a horn
  • A little cowboy with a big 'number one' hat crying for joy
  • Moses wearing sunglasses holding a list article carved into a tablet
  • Clipboard with a piece of paper on it that says 'do it to em', 'get stuff done', and 'be a legend'
  • The number one hundred thousand under a small green monster
  • The number two hundred and fifty thousand under an alien
  • The number five hundred thousand amongst a forest of eyeballs
  • The number one million on the earth, being watched by a planet sized eyeball
  • A person with their palms facing forward, wearing an uncooked turkey on their head
  • Butterflies flying around a pair of lips
  • A body builder cat flexing with 2022 written across its pecs
  • Snow White smiling serenely while looking at a bird that is perched on her hand
  • The golden snitch flying through the air
  • A green slime splatter
  • K-pop 'finger heart'
  • Funky disco dancer
  • A cat looking startled to see a human dressed as a cat eating from its bowl, labelled "Karen"
  • Two slimy tentacles touching and forming a heart shape
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  • 5 Reasons Why I Didn't Vote Today

    As we all know, today was Election Day, and like millions of Americans -- I did not remember to vote. Say what you will about my duty as an American or my ignorance; I've got five solid excuses:

  • The Top 12 Halloween Costumes Of 2014

    Are you sick of showing up to your cousins’ Halloween Party dressed as one of 10 “sexy” Marios? Did you think you’d blow everyone out of the water this year dressing up as Stefon, only to find Party City sells a pre-made Stefon costume-in-a-bag? Well, fear no more; here are 12 totally original, and completely topical Halloween costume ideas for the 2014 season* *nothing Ebola related will appear on this list because I am a paranoid germaphobe and that sh$t is real.

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