Hi Internet friends! My name is Kelly and I LOVE horror films. I also love '90s movies. So when I discovered that The Craft is now on Netflix, I knew I had to watch it!
It's the story of four teenage witches (yes, witches) who use their powers to seek revenge against their tormentors. And it's quite the wild ride!!! Here are some questions I had while watching:
1. Is it me, or does every '90s teen movie have the exact same cast? I know Scream came out after this movie, but I keep thinking Bonnie is Sidney Prescott and Chris is Billy Loomis.
2. Isn't the guy in the middle also the stoner kid in Clueless? I'm beginning to suspect all '90s movies were just one big multiverse.
3. How come the new girl always becomes a part of a tight-knit clique on her very first day of school? Does this actually happen in real life?
4. Why is the store owner just OK with Nancy and the girls shoplifting every time they come in?
5. Wait, the girls' secret meeting place is just an old couch behind some trees? This doesn't seem like a very secure place to drink and smoke, let alone loudly TELL EVERYONE HOW YOU'RE A WITCH.
6. Did people in the '90s really say "lay" a lot? I don't think I've ever heard anyone refer to sex as "a lay" in my life.
7. If Nancy lives with her mom and stepdad in a trailer with barely any money, how can she afford to go to private school? Also, if this is supposed to be LA, why is it always raining?
8. Again, this doesn't seem like a very safe spot to practice witchcraft. They're just doing these rituals in broad daylight now?!
9. How do they get away with reading their witchcraft books in the middle of MASS? Also, I just noticed half the students here don't seem to wear uniforms. Is the dress code optional or what?
10. How much was $175,000 worth in 1996? Would it really be enough to afford that penthouse?
11. Am I the only one who never tried this "light as a feather, stiff as a board" thing at a sleepover?
12. Do they ever explain how Bonnie got those severe burn marks? Man, a lot of these characters have really tragic backstories. I feel like I need to know more.
13. So, hypothetically, what would happen if someone just walked on the beach in the middle of this ritual?
14. How has Nancy not gotten a ticket yet? She has absolutely no regard for traffic lights.
15. OK, love spell or not, Chris is HORRIBLE. I can't even make it through this scene. Can Sarah use her powers against him? Please?
16. Can anyone just walk into these parties? It's been a long time since my high school days, but I feel like there was usually someone guarding the door at these things.
17. Can the girls transform into anybody they want? Or only each other?
18. Honestly, Nancy's "you don't even exist to me" speech was ON POINT. Am I really supposed to feel sorry for Chris? I don't.
19. How did they explain Chris's death to the police?
20. Does Sarah really think saying "please stop" is going to make all these snakes go away? Also WOW, the rest of the group turned on Sarah fast. This is like Mean Girls times 1,000.
21. I'm sorry, but this is the LAMEST "confession" note I've ever seen. Couldn't they have at least put some more effort into it? Have they not seen Heathers?
22. I don't have any questions about this scene, I just have to say that it's a NIGHTMARE.
23. Did Sarah's dad know her mom was a witch? Does he know that Sarah is one? Does this man know ANYTHING?!
24. Am I the only one who feels kind of bad for Nancy? Yeah, she did some really bad things, but pretty much all of the people she used her powers against were horrible. I don't know, this just doesn't feel like justice.
Overall, I enjoyed The Craft and I can definitely see why it has such a big cult following. There's something quite empowering about watching them take down boys with witchcraft. I can't wait for the reboot!
