I was born and raised in Cleveland, Ohio, and to this day am entrenched in an ongoing love affair with the city. I know that doesn’t make a ton of sense, but you know how Rihanna still seems to love Chris Brown for some reason, even though the rest of humanity knows he’s the worst thing in the world for her? It’s kinda like that.
Anyway, I’ve spent many a drunken night in New York (my adopted home) defending the Cleve from “Mistake By The Lake” cracks and jokes about LeBron James. So imagine my surprise and delight when the Browns actually found a way to win a game this week in the midst of one of the most depressing stretches in Cleveland sports history (which is saying something). Finally, I could come into work without hearing about my quarterback being a member of the AARP. Finally a break from Joe Haden’s Adderall love. Finally a day of moderate pride about something in Cleveland.
But of course I couldn’t even get that one nice day, without someone from Cleveland totally Clevelanding the moment. I give you, “Browns Fan Dunks Head In Bucket Of Urine For $450.”
This must have been how Bane felt when he looked at Gotham. Sometimes things need to be destroyed and rebuilt.
I will say in his defense, $450 will pay for like 8 months of rent in Cleveland.
5. Here’s a clearer video, but a worse angle.
- The Pentagon will now be able to decide how many of its troops are deployed in the war against ISIS and when they are sent there.
- Texas is suing the federal government for blocking a huge shipment of illegal execution drugs from entering the state 💉
- McDonald's spends big bucks rolling out "premium" menu items like leafy wraps, but data shows its customers just want cheap deals 🍔🍟
- An extraordinary new study claims humans roamed America 130,000 years ago, but fossil experts say don't believe the hype 🤔