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A Twentysomething Party Vs. A Thirtysomething Party

Just ONE glass of malbec. I have to get up early to go running tomorrow.

Twentysomething party: The fun doesn't really get going until 11:30 p.m.

Thirtysomething party: Everyone arrives promptly at 8.

Twenties: You invite a million people and don't care how many people are coming.

Thirties: Your guest rolled in with five of her friends and didn't RSVP???

Twenties: Just throw your stuff wherever, it doesn't matter.

Thirties: You gather coats and put them on your bed. Or on an actual coatrack!

The punch at a twentysomething party: a vat of Sunkist orange soda and Popov.

Thirties: EVERYONE brings a bottle of red wine.

Twenties: huddling in the bedroom to do drugs.

Thirties: huddling in bedrooms to look at someone's wedding dress Pinterest board.

At a twentysomething party: checking out someone.

Thirtysomething party: checking out someone's Vitamix.

Twentysomething party: dancing to the latest tunes.

Thirties: discussing your passionate feelings about Jonathan Franzen.

Twentysomething party: Food is a couple of bags of random tortilla chips.

Thirtysomething party: Someone brought something homemade and uber-fancy to show off how good they are at cooking.

Twentysomething party: Your neighbors ask you to turn the music down.

Thirties: YOU ask you to turn the music down.

Twenties: That one person brings an ironic six-pack of Smirnoff Ice.

Thirties: That one person brings their baby.

Twenties: getting mad when you catch people hooking up in your bedroom.

Thirties: getting mad when you catch a guest doing the dishes for you.

Twentysomething party games:

Thirtysomething party games:

Twenties: Take a bunch of shots with your fun quasi-alcoholic friend.

Thirties: Talk in concerned, hushed tones about how your quasi-alcoholic friend needs to "get it under control."

Twenties: getting mad when people steal your stuff.

Thirties: getting mad when someone accidentally takes home your casserole dish instead of theirs.

After a party in your twenties: You let the mess linger for days. (Maybe even...weeks.)

Thirtysomething party: You clean up that night (and your friends pitch in!).

Twenties: After the party it's the after-party, then after the party it's the hotel lobby.


After a fun night with your friends, at any age: