I Rewatched "The Baby-Sitters Club" Movie As An Adult And Had So Many Thoughts
I always wanted to be Claudia, but I'm such a Mary Anne.
In this post series, I've been revisiting the movies I loved as a pre-teen and teen. Like many '90s girls, I was obsessed with The Baby-Sitters Club – the books, the TV show AND the movie. But it's been a very long time since I rewatched the movie – here's how the experience of revisiting it went down...
1. This opening music is so ~funky~.
2. LISTEN PEOPLE EVERYWHERE, HO NA NA NA HEY.
3. I...didn’t realise I still knew this off by heart.
4. The Baby-Sitters Club couldn’t happen in 2018 because the whole premise hinges on the use of landline phones.
5. I remember being a kid and pretending I was in a movie as I got ready because all my fave movies seemed to open with people getting ready for the day.
6. When I was younger Kristy kind of annoyed me but I appreciate her a whole lot more now.
7. I always wanted to be a Claudia or Stacey but I’m a total Mary Anne and that’s okay. I adore her.
8. I’m also a little bit of a Mallory but I’d rather not talk about that.
9. “Likes her? Or like likes her?” That is such a tween vibe.
10. Oh wow I had Dawn’s outfit head-to-toe. The long skirt, the denim vest. A look.
11. This cast is full of basically all of my ‘90s girl crushes. It’s just missing Sarah Michelle Gellar and Reese Witherspoon.
12. “I love little kids with accents!” Hahahahahaha. Stacey is in for a shock.
13. “I thought you were going to the movies?” “I have my whole life to go to the movies.” When I was 9 I thought that was the most romantic line in the world.
14. I just realised Luca is supposed to have a full-on European accent. Wow. It’s bad.
15. “It’s the best.” “Do you mean like you?” I just threw up in my mouth a little bit.
16. Oh yeaaaah Stacey’s diabetes is a ~big secret~.
17. Shiiiit now that I’m a grown-ass adult, a 17-year-old dating a 13-year-old is even creepier than it was when I was younger.
18. “He’s been to Europe.” “He’s FROM Europe.” Yeah, I love Kristy.
19. Ellen Burstyn! I forgot she was the grumpy neighbour lady.
20. Cokie Mason is such an icon.
21. I used to have the biggest crush on Austin O’Brien. Mainly thanks to My Girl 2, but also Logan Bruno, of course.
22. Cokie definitely gets the best outfits.
23. Hahahahaha tricking Cokie and her minions into walking into a bunch of sprinklers is peak 13-year-old revenge. It’s perfect.
24. I still don’t understand how the adults of Stonybrook trusted a bunch of 13-year-olds (and 11-year-olds) to babysit their kids. Like, they’re still actual children themselves.
25. Oh no I’m so old I relate most to the neighbour who's irritated that a bunch of kids are making all this noise in her neighbourhood.
26. I feel like all this stuff for the summer camp would have cost them way more than the price of admission.
27. “We can’t let men get away with everything.” I LOVE KRISTY.
28. Ugh. Kristy’s dad. I hate him.
29. It’s terrible that he forces Kristy to keep his presence a secret. Also, what about Kristy’s brothers? Doesn’t he want to see them? The whole situation is so weird.
30. “It’s cowbody da– it’s cowgirl- it’s cowPEOPLE day!” We stan a gender-inclusive queen.
31. A lot of the lines I thought were the HEIGHT of comedy as a kid have not held up very well.
32. Logan and Mary Anne are so cuuuuuute even though they definitely gave me unrealistic expectations of tween relationships.
33. Why do they all assume Kristy has a boyfriend when a an ADULT MAN with a beard and everything picks her up?!?! That’s...not the most natural conclusion on any level.
34. “I’m writing a novel about the first nurse in America.” Mallory, I’m sorry I was every awful to you, I love you.
35. “Mallory, have you seen Dawn around?” “Yeah, she’s around.” I LOVE HER.
36. “If we keep going we’ll find it.” “Find what?” “Heaven.” Oh my god Luca is the WORST.
37. I haaaaaate Kristy’s dad so much.
38. Cokie saying “I’m trading you guys in” to her friends is such a mood.
39. “I promised Kristy.” “Go be her sister then.” That was way harsh, Dawn.
40. “We never fight.” Mallory, I think you’ll find, if you read the 200 books about you, that you ALWAYS fight.
41. “David Michael’s only 7.” Okay but Kristy is only 12! Like I get that she didn’t do what she was meant to do but also maybe don’t put the responsibility of caring for children on other children?!
42. Alan Grey was such a pest in the books but he’s kind of sweet (if also very annoying) in this.
43. Hahaha the rap! Oh man, I still know this too. “The brain, the brain, the centre of the chain…”
44. “Look at these tomatoes, they’re huge!” Why is this so funny to me.
45. I had a top with a heart on it just like Claudia’s!
46. It’s definitely not Kristy’s fault that Claudia failed her quiz.
47. Yes Kristy, drag your deadbeat dad. Draaaag him.
48. Stacey looks so cute with her hair curled like that.
49. Luca is shook she’s 13 and it’s being framed as bad that she lied but uhhhhh I feel like this is all on him.
50. It’s so DRAMATIC the way she’s coming home with her sunglasses on and the sad music playing. I guess if you’re 13 it would feel like the end of the world.
51. “These aberrations that you call children…” Ellen Burstyn is the best part of this movie.
52. I’m so into Dawn and Ellen Burstyn bonding over tea and trees.
53. Wait now Luca has come crawling back...with his harmonica?! And he knows Stacey's 13? Everything about this is awful.
54. Why is her mother encouraging this?
55. Kristy’s dad actually ghosted her on her birthday. What a guy.
56. This “Daddy’s Girl” song is a liiiittle on the nose right now.
57. Why do they act like getting ice cream cake was a bad idea, ice cream cake is great.
58. I can’t believe I’m a Mallory defender now.
59. RIP Cokie Mason’s awesome shoes in that cement.
60. Why am I crying over the girls coming to pick Kristy up?! Their friendship is so important. *sob*
61. Ugh Luca get out of there.
62. “I’m coming back next summer.” “I’ll be 14.” “I know.” Yeah and YOU’LL BE 18 MY GUY this isn’t any better. In fact, it’s worse?!
63. I thought that kiss was sooooooo swoon-worthy as a kid and now it’s super icky.
64. “It’s not your fault Kristy.” “You’re important to us.” Aaaand I’m crying again.
65. “You’re not supposed to be the grown-up here.” Finally, someone talks some sense.
66. Their profit is $168 from the WHOLE summer?!
67. I ship Alan and Dawn tbh.
68. I don’t care that Kristy’s dad writes her letters every few days, I still hate him. Also what about his other children?!
69. It’s real cute they gave Ellen Burstyn the greenhouse.
70. “If you can count the number of friends you’ve got on one hand, that’s a lot.” This line means a lot more to me as an adult lol.
71. Okay now I want to reread the books.