ABC Family has released the first four minutes from the upcoming season premiere of Pretty Little Liars, set to air in January. Naturally, we have a lot of questions...
1. Honestly, who let Ali become a teacher?
2. Is she magically no longer a sociopath? How did that happen?
3. Why is she dressing younger now that she’s a grown-ass teacher than she did in her teenage soccer mom phase in season 5?
4. Why was Alison writing “Mrs Rollins” on the blackboard in the finale flash-forward, when she is clearly nowhere near married to this guy?
5. And who IS this “Dr” Rollins and if he is a psychiatrist why is he bringing her information about the court hearing and sending out the summons to the girls?
6. Did the producers spend so much money on A’s mask budget last season that they can’t afford a proper Washington D.C. backdrop?
7. And did they deliberately time Ali saying “NOT a screen” when we first see the very obvious and atrocious green screen just for the lulz?
8. WHAT HAPPENED BETWEEN EZRIA?!
9. Is Ezra’s book called “Ostinato” because it’s a metaphor for this show which just continuously goes around and around in circles?
10. Did Pretty Little Liars hire the musical director from Grey’s Anatomy because this is a lot less Natasha Bedingfield and a lot more depressing melancholia?
11. Are these girls still in touch at all? Because it kinda doesn't seem like it?
12. Are you hiding Hanna’s ring finger from us on purpose?
13. What is the significance of her looking after that kid?
14. And why does she have an empty seat next to her?
15. And how the hell is she able to fly first class one year out of college?
16. In fact they’re all only 22 or 23 - how are they all apparently so successful already?
17. Why is Emily’s path so different to all the others aka why is she the only one apparently without a high-flying job?!
18. Is this just a tropical-themed bar in an airport? Because that’s what it looks like? Or is she actually supposed to be in some exotic location?
19. Also is she just putting the money she makes straight into her bag? That’s not a normal thing right?
20. Would any self-respecting bartender really wear a shirt that says “If You Like Pina Coladas?”
21. Why didn’t you just call CeCe Charlotte the whole time if that’s her actual name? It's not like the others would have known she was a DiLaurentis anyway?
22. Considering Charlotte fucked with these girls for years and potentially murdered a bunch of people, why is she scheduled for an appeal after ONLY FIVE YEARS?
23. And really, how did Ali forgive her so easily, it still doesn’t make any sense??
24. And Ali really expects all the others to be forgiving, REALLY??
25. Like she wants five minutes with the girls to explain… what? That the girl who tried to kill them all and tortured them for years is actually a good person?
26. “Five minutes that can change the whole world.” Wow, is that just Ali being dramatic or is something actually huge going on that we don’t know about?
27. Is Charlotte going to be a big part of the show now?
28. Where’s Jason in all of this?
29. Where's Mona?
30. When are we going to see Toby?
31. Will we ever see Wren again?
32. Where's Caleb?!
33. Are Hanna and Caleb together? Was Hanna looking wistfully at that child because she wants to have a baby with Caleb but for some reason they can’t?
34. Is Paige coming back? Are she and Emily together?
35. Are the Wine Moms still stuck in the basement? And we going to see them this season because honestly they’re the best part of the show?
36. What’s the big mystery for the season going to be? Is it who “he” is?!
37. Because honestly how can it be the same show without any kind of “A”? OR WILL THERE BE ANOTHER A?!
38. Why am I still so obsessed with this show?
39. WHY ISN'T IT JANUARY ALREADY?!
