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29 Rude, Strange, And Dumb Questions People Have Been Asked About Scotland

"Do you share your living room with farm animals?"

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2. I was asked by an American, do we have sidewalks? Also, does Scotland have cheese? Are our planes safe? Do we watch American TV? And how do we celebrate 4th of July? (To which I replied we don't tend to celebrate a war we lost!)

Submitted by Lauren Blancolo, Facebook.

3. "Do you live in mud huts like in Braveheart?" Also, "Do you drink anything other than whisky?" Like, no, I want to, but we're not allowed.

Submitted by Danny Kelso, Facebook.

4. This is the one that gets to me: "You live in Scotland? My folks visited there and met a Mary McKay (always pronounced wrongly) Do you know her?" There are around 6 million of us.

Submitted by Nettiet.

6. "Do you have electricity and phones in Scotland?" Yes, I really did get asked this in 1998. Sigh.

Submitted by Mel Raven, Facebook.

7. "How hard is it to catch a haggis? Are there competitions? Do you have professional haggis catchers?" I mean, come on.

Submitted by sarahi4a1216669.

8. American tourist on the Edinburgh to King's Cross train: "When will we go through the wall?" Me: "What wall?" "The one dividing England and Scotland." Took a lot of blank looks before I realised he was talking about the Roman Hadrian's Wall. He refused to believe that movement between England and Scotland was free and insisted on repeating the question to everyone in the carriage.

Submitted by kerennicol.

10. On a trip to America I was asked: "Do you have benches in Scotland?", "Have you ever met The Beatles?", "Is Scotland near Florida?", and "How do you heat and light your houses without electricity?" (Despite assuring them that we do have electricity!) It was also commented on how well I spoke English.

Submitted by LHillsX.

11. "Do you share your living room with farm animals in Scotland?"

I mean, what even is that?

Submitted by Hannahwoof13.

12. Them: "Do you have roads in Scotland?" Me: "Actually we use a complicated system of levers and pulleys to swing from place to place."

Submitted by Greg Flucker.

14. When living in America I was asked if I "miss the smell of Scotland". I still don't understand the question or how to answer that.

Submitted by ionam48e9eee74.

15. "Do people get pregnant easier in Scotland?"

Submitted by katier4c41db760.

16. I had two (both came from the same *ahem* idiot). "Does Scotland have hospitals?" Then, later on, an exclamation of "Scotland has a border!?" when we were just about to cross the border on a bus.

Submitted by eilidhw4aff39190.

18. I was once asked by a girl in her twenties: "What kind of vegetable is haggis?"

Submitted by sophiec47f304bae.

19. I was told my English was very good, and had I learned it especially for my trip to America? I was also asked "did Scottish people live in mud huts?" and, most bizarrely, a man asked me how long it would take to drive from Scotland to Sweden.

Submitted by laurawhyte21.

20. "How long does it get from one end of Scotland to the other when all you have are single-track roads?" Ummmmm. We have motorways, dual carriageways, and the rest. And we bloody well invented tarmac!

Submitted by Simon Crerar.

23. "Do you have toilets in Scotland – should I bring my she-wee?"

Submitted by AC0404.

24. I've had this conversation way too many times in the States: "I'm Scottish." "Oh my god! No way! I'M SCOTTISH TOO! My mom's dad's great-great-aunt on his father's side once removed was from Inverness – would you know the family?" "No, sorry. I live in Glasgow." "Isn't Inverness just, like, the next village or something?" No offence, Americans. Scotland is tiny compared to your vast land, but we don't all live a village away from one another.

Submitted by Megan McBurnie, Facebook.

25. "Do you get bacon in Scotland?" I was legitimately asked this once.

Submitted by kristinr410ef6516.

27. "Do you listen to modern music in Scotland or is it all bagpipes?" And of course: "Have you seen the Loch Ness monster?"

Submitted by lorim40a075166.

28. I was asked once: "Do you have luminous colours in Scotland?"

Submitted by leem4730ae16b

29. And finally, everyone's favourite question:

''Scotland? That's in London, right?''

Submitted by April May Thomson, Facebook.

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