24 First Date Horror Stories That Will Make You Delete Every Single Dating App On Your Phone

    "I had to get a ride home with the cops."

    Recently, we challenged the BuzzFeed Community to tell us the worst dates they've ever been on, and first off, I just want to say I am sorry to each and every one of you. Y'all had some wild stories! Here are some of the worst:

    1. "I met a girl for a drink, and had two with her. She wanted to take me for a ride in her loaner BMW. It was raining. Five minutes later she put it into a concrete barrier going 100 mph and got arrested for a DUI. I had to get a ride home from the cops."

    —Anonymous

    2. "She casually informed me, apropos of nothing, that she practices giving blowjobs on tampons. She offered to demonstrate. I said no thanks, but she did anyway. The entire restaurant stared at us. There was not a second date."

    —Anonymous

    Screenshots from "Mean Girls"

    3. "I excused myself to use the bathroom. He followed me there and tried to peek. 😬"

    —Anonymous

    4. "He told me he couldn't see me again because I'd embarrassed him by laughing at the film we were watching at the cinema. It was a comedy."

    medeaxi

    5. "It started normally enough. I met a guy at a bar. We were the only two singing 'Sweet Caroline,' so we chatted a bit, and I gave him my number. A week later, I met him at his place to watch a movie then go out for food. He seemed nice enough and eagerly took me down to his theater room where I found out there was no movie. Instead, he showed me a horrifically long slideshow of his last family vacation and went into painful detail about every aspect of the trip."

    "Mind you, I’ve never met anyone in his family. An hour later, I was ready for us to go out to dinner — a final chance to redeem himself. He excused himself to change. When he came back out, he was wearing only the Borat speedo. I’m not really sure what he thought would happen. Whatever it was did not occur. I left as quickly as I could and then got calls for a month trying to reconnect. I didn’t answer them."

    —Anonymous

    borat in bright revealing bathing suit

    6. "He asked if I liked music. I said yes, and without any kind of follow-up question, he started singing opera at full volume, acting like he was treating me to a private concert. The restaurant staff were all staring at us, and I wanted to crawl under the table. Finally after one song he stopped and then got all huffy when I didn't fall over myself with praise at his mediocre performance."

    —Anonymous

    7. "I was 18, living in frosty Pittsburgh, and had just graduated high school. I went to visit my aunt and uncle for an entire month in New Orleans. I met some really cool friends, and I was asked to go on a water skiing date with a very nice young man. He picked me up for the date, and all was going well. It was four guys and me, but everyone was nice. We all took turns skiing, and his turn was up. As we were turning around, I saw him fall. The fall looked strange, and he was weakly waving his arms in the air. I shouted, 'He's hurt!' They all said, 'Duh.' I said, 'No he's hurt, hurry!' We quickly got to him, and I had to be the one to say 'pull him up into the boat.' I quickly figured I was in a boat of clueless young men."

    "As they were pulling him up, he was groaning and said his back hurt. So again I had to be the one to say 'lay him flat on the deck.' They did so and started racing to shore, hitting every wave hard and jarring him so hard he was moaning — again, I had to speak up and tell the clueless trio to slow down. We got to shore and in the ambulance, got to the hospital, etc., and then the fun began. The staff thought I was his girlfriend and asked me a million questions about him. I didn't even know his last name. I didn't know where TF I was. It was the '80s; I didn't even know my aunt's phone number. The guys that were with us disappeared. I didn't know the address to my aunt's house. I had no money. I just kept saying, 'It's our first date, 'it's our first date.' 

    All turned out well. His friends ended up driving me to my aunt's house. He was up on crutches and came to see me the next week and thank me. The doctor said without my nurse's training he may have become disabled. I was all like, WTF. I'm just a stoner from PA."

    —Anonymous

    8. "He seemed so nice and normal. Then I mentioned that I liked Taylor Swift, and he said, 'Me, too, I love how Aryan she is.' I’m literally Jewish! I left immediately."

    —Anonymous

    man on new girl asks schmidt if he's jewish and schmidt makes a series of confused faces

    9. "I finally went on a date with my best friend’s roommate who had been DMing me for a while. Everything was going absolutely great, so after dinner we decided to take things over to his place. After a few hours of chatting, his apartment door opens, and it’s his EX-GIRLFRIEND. She storms in, leaves the door open, and starts yelling at him all while he says, 'I told you I was on a date tonight.' Turns out they were 'raising the dog together.' As soon as the dog ran out the door of the apartment down the hallway, I used that as my exit. He chased after me trying to explain that they were not together. Long story short they got back together, like, a week after that. (Never heard from him again until months later where he tried to talk to me on Hinge like nothing happened.)"

    —Anonymous

    10. "I started talking to this dude I met on Hinge who was a recent veteran of the military (at a mere 26 years old). Long story short, we bought concert tickets together before I realized it maybe wasn’t for me. I decided to go through with the second date and do dinner and the concert together — it was his first one, and apparently, he’d avoided them due to anxiety. It all started to go downhill when we took a long, heinous drive to Miami — which he volunteered to do — where he yelled and aggressively drove the entire time. Mind you, my family’s from New Jersey, but this was DIFFERENT from normal driving aggression. He was one of the most muscular dudes I’ve ever seen, and quite frankly, I sat there quietly, knowing that was the best option."

    "Anyways, things really got bad when we got to Miami about 10 minutes late for a sushi reservation. We were right outside the restaurant while looking for parking, so I decided to jump out and make sure I made it on time. Little did I know he was PISSED. As bad as I felt about making him park, that’s just a normal part of going out in Wynwood on any Friday. But this man came stoooorming into the restaurant, walked PAST me to the bathroom with ZERO acknowledgment, came back, and proceeded to yell/berate me for getting out of the car. Mind you, I cry when people yell. I’ve never liked it, and this grown man was scaring the absolute shit out of me. He ended up apologizing while still fuming, knowing well I likely didn’t see this going anywhere considering I was crying on our SECOND date. Shit was bonkers. I told him I’d be happy to enjoy the concert together and then go our separate ways, but he decided to instead LEAVE ME OVER AN HOUR AWAY FROM HOME IN MIAMI. BY MYSELF. I found my way home that night, but man that date was fucking bonkers. I hope he got help."

    —Anonymous

    11. "After chatting for a week on a dating site, we decided to meet for coffee. As soon as we sat down at a table, he slid a piece of paper across the table. This took me aback. There were three questions: '1. Do you have to take medication to function? 2. Have you ever got a DUI? 3. Have you ever been arrested?' And there was a line to sign my name above it. Needless to say, I was appalled — not because I had anything to hide, but how this was done. I left immediately."

    —Anonymous

    Woman in an office setting expressing frustration about modern dating and technology

    12. "We decided to walk around a nature reserve. We both accidentally stumbled into a yellowjackets' nest and got swarmed. I ended up with stings all over my body. We didn’t see each other again."

    savannahp42a09898d

    13. "He randomly told me that he hates trans people. Little did he know that I am trans."

    —Anonymous

    14. When I was in graduate school for my doctorate. I met a gentleman at a bar, and we hit it off. He was a rocket scientist, and I was in a similar field, so we nerded out all night. He was delightful and charming. He asked me out and got my number. I told him that it probably couldn't happen until I was done with a very important oral defense for my PhD program. I was also going to a foreign country to do a mission trip. He knew all of this and seemed cool with waiting at first. But then he started badgering me to take me out on a date to the point of guilting me for leading him on, etc. He was sort of in my circle of friends, so I finally agreed to go on the date (mistake #1), which was the night before I went on this mission trip."

    "I agreed to dinner and told him that I had to be home to get up early the next day, so dinner was all I could probably swing. Well, he insisted on picking me up at my apartment (mistake #2) and took me out to an Irish bar to listen to his favorite band. It was loud, and we could barely hear each other. He talked about himself the whole time, and I sort of checked out. I kicked myself for not driving, because he proceeded to guilt me into going back to his apartment to watch a movie. His favorite one — The Princess Bride. I was tired and had a headache. I did not want to do this, but he drove. I was a people pleaser back then, and the 'Midwest Nice' politeness was still strong within me. So, I agreed (mistake #3). 

    I walked into his apartment. To my utter horror, there was no couch, only a sad-looking partially-deflated air mattress on the floor masquerading as a seating area, a TV on a makeshift table, action hero posters on the wall, and a few bookshelves with action figures and knickknacks. I immediately thought. 'Welp, my head is going to end up in the freezer tonight.' I tried to back out and bring up my headache, but he had already put The Princess Bride on and cracked a few Keystone Lights for us. He again guilted me, so I sucked it up and sat down on this sad, sad air mattress (mistake #4). I tried to keep some distance, but he scooted closer and closer until he had basically arranged me so his arms were hugged around me and I was situated with my back to his chest. His mouth was very close to my ear. I was so tired, angry, and uncomfortable that I avoided turning my head toward him at all costs. I tried to escape the position several times, but his arms were like a vice around my body. So, I gave up (mistake #5). He then proceeded to recite the dialogue of The Princess Bride to me. No reprieve, no other conversation — just movie dialogue the entire time. As the movie was ending, he tried to turn me toward him to kiss me, and I basically tucked and rolled out of the position and hopped up. Free at last, free at last!!! I said, 'I need to go, I have to be up at 7 a.m., and its already 1 a.m.' He said, 'As you wish.' I was close to vomiting at this point and just wanted to leave. 

    The ride home was him discussing his mother, how close they were, and how he couldn't wait to introduce me. He told me that wherever he moves for a job, she will likely move with him. I didn't say a word. As he pulled up to my apartment, I opened the door before the car even stopped and basically tucked and rolled out of the vehicle. I turned around and said 'thanks for the date' and ran into my apartment before he could even get out of the car or get a word in otherwise. 

    I thought that was the end of it, but no. He asked me out again, and this time, I didn't respond (ghosting is shitty, but I didn't want to give him any avenue to talk to me). He kept texting; I ignored him. He then started to email me. Long-winded, arrogant emails filled with fancy words basically telling me how he was a nice guy/thought we had a connection and that I was evil for ghosting him, etc. There were a good 10–12 emails before they stopped."

    —Anonymous

    Westley from The Princess Bride saying "as you wish"

    15. "I met this guy online. He invited me out on a date, and we met up at a mall parking lot. He then drove us to a church parking lot, where he left his headlights on so we could play basketball on the court they had there. It was very bizarre. We finished playing and started chatting, and I realized this guy was just not for me, so I asked for a ride back to my car. When he parked, I jumped out quickly, hoping to get away before he got out of the car. He got out and asked for a hug. I let him hug me, but what I didn't expect was for him to reach his hand by my ear. I was wearing hoop earrings, and he ripped my earring out of my ear. When I turned my head to grab it from the pain, he tried to kiss me, and his kiss landed on my chin."

    "I got out of there so fast I don't even remember if I stopped to pick up the earring he ripped out. The next day, he called me to tell me he just wanted to be friends, and he maxed out the time on my voicemail. When I didn't call him back, he left long nasty messages telling me what an awful person I was. I'm so glad I dodged that bullet."

    —Anonymous

    16. "When I was young, I was basically a bowl of sugar water that attracted cockroaches. Most of my first dates were horrible. The one that was downright hilarious was the Subway manager who took me to his job at 3 in the morning as some sort of weird flex. The shop was closed. I guess he thought having the key to open up a Subway shop after hours was his metaphorical peacock feathers or something? Bruh didn’t even feed me, just opened up the shop and let me look around. 😭"

    catladyjo82

    17. "We had some tacos and a couple drinks at the bar and were talking and having a relatively good time, so we went back to her place. She wanted to give a tour of her apartment, which started innocently enough. Kitchen, living room, etc. Then we went to her 'office.' She said, 'This is still a work in progress, I just moved in a month ago.' But there was one complete thing in this room. A shrine. To Taylor Swift."

    "We are both in our mid 30s. She had four tops/shirts/jacket that had letters of authenticity of being worn on stage by TS. She had been to nine concerts and had EVERY SINGLE cup, wristband, glow stick, collectable microphone, poster, whatever you could buy from the tours she's had. Under it was a pullout drawer with three of every album released on vinyl up to that point. One of each was opened — two were unopened to preserve the value. I was thinking...okay...everyone is into something. She then wanted to watch some TV and have some more drinks, but she turned on the TS concert that was two or so hours long and then sang the first songs (on the matching collectible microphone from that tour) and told me that if I didn't know the words, then this wasn't going to work out and asked me to leave."

    —Anonymous

    girl asks if guy knows taylor's album "red"

    18. "This would never fly if it happened on a date now, but I was young and didn’t leave when I should have, which would have been immediately. I’d been texting someone who I’d known my whole life — we were family friends, and we always went to the same school. We finally met up for a date to take a walk around a lake, and immediately he insulted me. Told me I dressed like a 'hooker' (shorts in summertime) and I’d have to stop dressing that way. Next he insisted on me telling him my full dating history including names and reasons we broke up. He made fun of these people he didn’t even know and said I was dumb for dating any of them. Next he insulted my career path, which was event and wedding planning. He said, 'That’s a dumb job, there’s not even that much that goes into planning a wedding.'"

    "For some reason, that was when I decided there was no hope and I needed to leave, and he would not drive me back to where we’d met and I left my car. He wanted us to keep hanging out and would not drive me back until I started to call a cab. Lastly, he was offended I didn’t want to kiss him as I left. Ew. NEVER spoke to him again, and I hope for the sake of the next girl that he got some manners."

    —Anonymous

    19. "I met this guy on Match (this was about 10–11 years ago), and we seemed to have good conversations through Yahoo chat and texting. We decided to meet up for dinner; he picked me up, and we went to eat. He suddenly went super quiet as I was cutting my chicken. I asked him if he was okay, and he responded that his ex-fiancé used to cut her food the same way after her gastric bypass surgery, and proceeded to tell me the details of their breakup for the rest of the meal."

    "He drove me home, and told me we couldn't see each other again because he wasn't over her yet. First and last date!"

    —Anonymous

    20. "I went on a first date with a guy at Starbucks. He was new to our friend group, and I didn’t know him all that well so we drove separately. When he arrived, the conversation stalled after we exchanged the usually greetings of 'hello' and 'how are you doing?' I would ask him a question, and he would only give a one- or two-word answer. It was like that for the ENTIRE two hours."

    "But that isn’t even the worst part. I later found out in a group chat from a friend that he was MARRIED and some of the guys in our friend group already knew. They failed to mention that fact and didn’t think it was a big deal that it went unmentioned. I guess his guilty conscience was holding his tongue!"

    —Anonymous

    woman saying "you're married?!"

    21. "I matched with a dude on a dating site. We exchanged some messages, and he asked if I wanted to get sushi. We met up at the restaurant, and he was super drunk. I ask him if he had a drink to calm his nerves, to which he replied, 'I don't drink,' and proceeds to pull out one of those AA chips celebrating sobriety. At this point I am super confused, and after seeing my confusion, he said, 'Well, sometimes I drink... AA is a lifestyle choice' and said he only 'likes a few of the steps' (in the recovery program) so he only follows those ones."

    "At this point I was already ready to leave, but I really like sushi and very rarely get the chance to eat it, so I figured I would enjoy my meal (maybe not the company) and I wouldn't have to talk to him again after. He informed me that he was an 'incredibly wealthy businessman' and had gone to a top university so that made him better than everyone else. He said that even though I had a degree, he was willing to take a chance on the date, but firmly believes that women should not hold jobs and should not seek any sort of higher education. He assured me that I would find my life's purpose by taking care of his needs. He also told me that while in a group of people that he expects women to be seen and not heard, women must maintain a certain size or smaller, and he would like to weigh me. When I looked at him like he was out of his mind, he assured me, 'It's not weird. You'll get used to it since we will weigh you each night to make sure you don't get fat.' 

    He became super sloppy as this date continued (he went to the bathroom a few times...I think to drink a flask). At one point he needed the waiter's attention and snapped his fingers at the next employee that walked by and shouted at her what he needed. I tried to calmly tell him that this person wasn't our waiter, and he told me, 'It doesn't really matter. They all look the same' (referring to the Asian women that worked there). Now I was mortified because the tables around us saw him treat the waitstaff like trash, and he was getting louder and more belligerent. I started texting my parents, letting them know that I wasn't feeling safe, BUT that's exactly when he fell asleep. It was nice. This drunk stranger, passed out — it was the only enjoyable part of the night (at least he was finally quiet). 

    In the end, he slept through dinner, then woke up and insisted on paying for the meal because 'when you are his lady, you aren't allowed to work' and 'women shouldn't have money' because we apparently like to spend it on shoes and makeup. At this point we were finally leaving the restaurant. He looked at me and told me that I was his future wife and he wanted me to come back to his place to meet his friends. I tried to make up the excuse that we were not very close to his place. ... He assured me that he picked this specific restaurant because it was within walking distance of his apartment (how convenient). I let him know that I had plans and made moves toward my vehicle. He finally agreed that we could just meet up again tomorrow (no) and pulled me in for the worst hug of my life. ... I hope he has gotten the help he needs, but his conversation made it apparent that he saw nothing wrong with his choices."

    —Anonymous

    22. "We had to wait for our dinner reservation so we started walking around the mall. We entered a few stores chatting and browsing. In one of the stores there was a stack of T-shirts. I picked up the small T-shirt on top of the pile and unfolded it just to see the graphic on the front. Behind me I heard my date's voice, 'Oh, that will never fit you.' Yes, yes, thank you very much for that assessment!"

    "Now in my 40s, I would have just left him standing there, but me 10 years ago endured the rest of the awkward date. In retrospect, I think he genuinely had no idea that you don't comment on a woman's size on the first date (or ever for that matter). On the drive home, he said, 'One day I think I'll have enough confidence to date.' I wonder if he found that confidence?"

    —Anonymous

    23. "I went out with a guy in college that I knew from a restaurant he used to work at with my high school ex (my ex was already in college). The guy didn’t remember me, so I thought 'clean slate.' I should have thought 'red flag' since he and my ex had been friends. (Side note, my ex left town after we broke up and apparently cut ties with everyone.) When we went out, he first took me to score weed (back when it was still illegal in our state), then took me on a drive-by past his ex-fiancés house. Twice. Yeah, did not see him again."

    strcar

    Scene from a film featuring a woman expressing dismay with the text quote "Had to be the worst first date ever in my life."

    24. And finally... "About 10 years ago, I went on a blind date set up by a matchmaking service (that I paid a lot of money for) with a guy who very clearly wanted to be in the mafia. He was late, and way overdressed in a $1,000 suit for dinner at a small pizza place. He strolled in with handful of male groupies with him and proceeded to try and order for me when he sat down. He didn't ask me a single question, blathered on about his 'business,' and patted me on the butt when I got up to leave."

    —Anonymous

    Now it's your turn — what's your worst first date ever? Tell us your horror story in the comments — or via this anonymous form — and you could be featured in an upcoming BuzzFeed Community post.

    Submissions have been edited for length/clarity.