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    People Shared The TV Shows That Actually Did A Good Job Of Depicting Grief, And These Are All Must-Watches

    "It's just gonna drown me."

    Recently, we asked the BuzzFeed Community to tell us the TV shows and scenes that did a really good job of depicting grief. Here are some of their responses!

    WARNING: Spoilers ahead! Also, some of the submissions contain mentions of child abuse and depression.

    1. Zoey and her family's slow grief over losing their patriarch to a degenerative condition on Zoey's Extraordinary Playlist:

    while dancing, Zoey asks her dad what she'll do when she can't hear him sing anymore, and he says she'll always hear him, whether it's a song or not, and all she has to do is listen

    "The way they showed Zoey's dad's illness progress, and how the characters struggled throughout it was so, so good. Sometimes, the grief starts before the loss, and I don't think we talk about or see that enough. Seeing how Zoey was struggling to maintain some normalcy, but also trying to spend as much time as she could with her dad and her family before he passed, while grappling with the fear and devastation of knowing she was going to lose him was so well done. I think they portrayed the emotions so accurately, and from different viewpoints for each character. I felt like I was watching a mirror version of my own experience."


    2. Marshall's grief after his father died on How I Met Your Mother:

    Marshall tells Ted about driving with his dad as a kid, and how it seemed he could see in the darkness, saying "And now he's just gone, and it's pitch black. I can't see where I'm going. I can't see anything"

    "I know a lot of people use the episode from How I Met Your Mother when Marshall finds out his dad passed, but the episodes after where he was struggling with last words and finding his way hits me in a totally different way. Especially the scene where Marshall talks about driving at night in the snow and it feels like he can't see the way his dad seemed to...And his dad admits that he couldn't see either, but he just kept going, wishing for the best. I love the vulnerability Marshall has throughout this whole process, even several episodes after the funeral."


    3. The collective grief explored in The Leftovers:

    Nora talks about being sick with her family, saying she's not asking for that perfect day at the beach, but just that horrible Saturday, her whole family sick and miserable, but alive and together

    "The Leftovers approached grief in what felt to be the truest depiction of people's experiences I've seen on TV. The beauty of the show was that it wasn't trying to solve any big questions; instead, it allowed its characters space to move through their emotions uniquely and unevenly. The scene where Carrie Coon's character wishes she could have one more crappy sick day back with her family perfectly embodies the heartache of missing everyday, banal normalities in the absence of them."


    4. Haley's depression after her mom died in One Tree Hill:

    Nathan pulls Haley away from the flaming piano, asking her if she's okay and what happened. Haley says she's gonna go call her mom
    The CW

    "Haley’s grief on One Tree Hill breaks me because it hits home. My Grandma died two years ago but she raised me, so by all accounts she was my mom. I’ve never felt more seen than when I rewatched the episodes of Haley’s grief. I also liked how the show showed her grief and depression over an extended period of time. Most shows just focus on it for one episode, but that’s not how grief works. It can sneak up on you after you’ve had the perfect day. It can make you lash out on loved ones, push your talent to the side, literally sit and soak, lose sleep and see your loved one in other things/people like Haley did with the owl."


    5. The aftermath of Joyce's death on Buffy the Vampire Slayer, but especially Anya's monologue:

    Anya talks about how she doesn't understand why Joyce can't just get back in her body and wake up, and how Joyce can't eat or drink or brush her hair anymore, and it's all mortal and stupid
    The WB

    "The Buffy episode 'The Body.' it gets disregarded as a supernatural show, but the death was completely natural and the entire hour is so devastating but so real as everyone processes their loss. One of the best depictions of grief ever."


    "All things associated with Joss Whedon are understandably under a dark cloud right now, but 'The Body' is an extraordinary look at grief. Anya’s speech about not understanding death and just wanting someone to make it make sense for her is some of the best writing I’ve ever come across."


    6. Caroline's grief after her mother died on The Vampire Diaries, but especially the scene where Damon tells her grief gets worse after the first few days:

    Damon tells Caroline, "Today it's the worst day of your life. Today and tomorrow, that's a cakewalk. There'll be people around day in and day out like they're afraid to leave you alone. The worst day? That's next week, when there's nothing but quiet"
    The CW

    "Definitely Caroline Forbes From The Vampire Diaries, she shows how bad the pain can feel and she even turns her humanity off because she couldn’t handle the pain. Obviously we can’t turn off our humanity in real life, but I think she showed us what grief feels like emotionally and physically."


    "The scene in The Vampire Diaries when Damon tells Caroline that the funeral won't be the worst day of her life, it's later on when everyone is gone. Resonated with me after I lost my mum."


    7. Sid going to school and then a club because he didn't know what else to do after his dad died on Skins:

    Sid says he came to school because he didn't know what else to do, and Tony asks what happened, but Sid says he can't say it

    "That one makes me cry just thinking about. How he goes about his day only to break down with Tony at the club. Gut wrenching just isn’t a strong enough word, but I don’t know a better one."


    8. Jane's immediate reaction to discovering Michael is dead in Jane the Virgin:

    Jane learns Michael is dead on the phone, then screams and falls down, Rafael holding her
    The CW

    "When Jane finds out that Michael is dead in Jane the Virgin was surreal to me. It was almost exactly my reaction to finding out my dad had died of heart attack out of nowhere. I have seen and appreciated a lot of different ways movies and TV shows have depicted grief since experiencing that on my own, however Jane the Virgin really hits that initial shock of finding out in a way I haven't quite seen before."


    9. Everything about Sorry for Your Loss:

    Leigh says, "I hate how in the beginning, everyone wants to send you flowers. And then they stop calling and writing and doing nice things for you because they're over it, and they expect you to be over it"
    Facebook Watch

    "Such a well done show with a great cast! Elizabeth Olsen as Leigh was amazing. A lot of shows explore grief briefly, but this whole show was about grief. It showed both the bad and the good. The second season explored Leigh getting better only to get bad again, and the anger you can feel toward those who are gone, which is an area that is not explored much."


    "It’s really underappreciated. The whole cast is so talented and Elizabeth Olsen is, as always, such a powerhouse. It’s meant a lot to me considering that I’ve lost people close to me in my life. It’s played realistically because they don’t shy away from addressing the work it takes when you’re grieving a loved one. You’ll have good days and bad days. In a strange way, it made me feel better and less alone. It was cathartic to relive it through the character. I’ll always recommend it."


    10. President Bartlet's crisis of faith in the church after Mrs. Landingham was killed by a drunk driver on The West Wing:

    Jed calls God a son of a bitch, saying Mrs. Landingham had just bought her first new car and he hit her with a drunk driver, then yells in Latin "Am I to believe these things from a righteous God, a just God, a wise God?"

    "The scene in the cathedral where Jed, a man of strong faith, begins to question and yell at god felt so real. And then of course his refusal to hire a new secretary for over a year because he couldn’t replace her. Especially when she showed up to him as a memory/hallucination almost just to give him advice, because he felt guilty about her death and missed her deeply."


    11. BoJack's eulogy for his mother on BoJack Horseman:

    Bojack talks about how when someone toxic in your family dies, you realize you'll never have the relationship you wanted, and as long as they were alive, some stupid part of you still hoped for that, and you didn't realize it until they died

    "I also dealt with a toxic, abusive mother, and the eulogy episode brought me to cathartic tears. This show understands that grief is not linear, isn't tidy, isn't logical, and isn't pretty. That's a refreshing take and some much needed truth on television."


    12. The aftermath of Finn's death on Glee:

    Burt says he wished he hugged him the last time he saw him and Kurt takes Finn's jacket saying it made him look like Superman and Carol talks about the pain of losing a child and wondering how she's going to do it

    "Glee handled it so well. Cory Monteith died in real life in the middle of filming that specific season and the episode made in memoriam of him is incredible. Each character reacts differently, and because they were friends in real life, some of the reactions are genuine. We see characters cope the rest of the season — some of them never truly recover. It’s done so well. I also like that they’d never stated a cause of death for him in the show; grief exists regardless of the reason why he passed. It’s so good."


    13. The entirety of Six Feet Under, but especially Brenda's complicated feelings after Nate died:

    Brenda imagines Nate in the car next to her, berating her for her "wronged wife" routine and for being mad she has to raise Maya, and calling her family psychotic, saying they all destroy everything they love — Brenda cries for him to leave her alone

    "Six Feet Under expertly portrayed all the emotions of loss and the stages of grief, including the funny and uncomfortable parts. There's a reason the final episode is one of the most talked-about TV finales of all time. I could pick a million different scenes: Nate's visceral anguish as he buries Lisa in the desert under a giant tree in the moonlight, Claire being unable to get dressed for her brother's funeral, Brenda's complicated cocktail of grief, anger, betrayal and total overwhelm at having to look after Maya after Nate's death. But ultimately: 'You can't take a picture of this. It's already gone.'"


    14. Piper's anger over Prue's death on Charmed:

    banging on Prue's grave, Piper says, "How could you go and die and leave me here alone? Please come back? I need you. Please come back. How could she think that I could live without her?"
    The WB

    "Charmed, when Piper and Phoebe grieve Prue's death. Phoebe bottles it up to try and be the strong one, and then breaks down later. Piper's anger when Prue's funeral is interrupted by a demon attack and then when she has an explosion of grief at Prue's's all very real and heartbreaking."


    15. Meredith having to explain Derek's death to their children on Grey's Anatomy:

    Meredith tells Zola she can't fix Derek, because no one can, because he's dead

    "It may be a very unpopular opinion, but I think Grey's did a good job with handling grief after Derek's death. The way they showed Meredith telling her children about their dad was heartbreaking. Meredith left for nine months to be alone and not be in a place that reminded her of Derek. The way she slowly moved on with her life by selling their house and beginning a new life but all done slowly in matters of year. Also, Amelia's story of how Derek's death could be the thing which would push her towards addiction was also great."


    16. Devi's dreams and memories of her father, who died suddenly, in Never Have I Ever:

    In a dream, Devi tells her dad that he died, and he says "Oh, that? I'm better now," then Devi wakes up and looks sad

    "Great exploration of Devi’s (and her mom's) grief after her dad died."


    17. The complicated exploration of grief over a bad parent on The Umbrella Academy:


    "The show does an excellent job illustrating how complicated relationships bring complicated feelings when someone dies. I’ve been a huge fan of the show since Season 1 was first released, but it’s even more meaningful to me now that I’ve personally experienced what it’s like to lose a father unexpectedly. I grew up in something of a dysfunctional family, and my dad and I didn’t have the closest relationship. Right after he died, I found myself back in my childhood home, desperately trying to navigate some very heavy feelings in a place that I tried hard to avoid for nearly a decade. The experience as a whole was disorienting. But I found a lot of comfort and familiarity during that time by rewatching Umbrella Academy episodes. It’s so powerful to see your grief reflected on the screen. Especially if that grief is tinged with guilt and regret over losing any possibility of reconciling a distant relationship, like mine was. Thanks to the show, I felt much less alone in what I was going through."


    18. Cristina's description of what happens after death in Grey's Anatomy:

    Cristina tells a young girl that if her mom dies, she'll feel like she could've done more, but that's not true; she did everything she could. Cristina says it'll hurt every time she thinks of her mom, but will hurt less and less over time

    "There's a beautiful scene in Grey's Anatomy when Cristina is sitting with a little girl whose mom went into surgery. The girl asks what will happen if her mom dies, and Cristina says they'll cross that bridge if they come to it. A few seconds later, Jackson walks up and shakes his head no, and Cristina tells the girl, 'If your mom dies, there are a lot of things that will happen. First, you'll feel like you could've done more to help her, but that's not true. You did everything you could. I want you to remember that. Then, it'll hurt every time you think of her, but over time, it'll hurt less and less. Eventually, you'll remember her, and it'll only hurt a little.' Cristina is speaking from experience, because her dad died when she was 7. Later on in the episode, Cristina gets really emotional and cries to Owen, 'I miss my dad!' It's one of the most beautiful descriptions and depictions of how grief can hit even decades later."


    19. Basically everything about Wanda's grief over both Vision and her brother in WandaVision:

    Next to Vision, Wanda says, "It's just like, this wave washing over me again and again. It knocks me down, and when I try to stand up, it just comes for me again. And I can''s just gonna drown me"
    Disney+ / Marvel

    "Even though WandaVision isn't real, it still really did a good job with grief: The feelings of denial and fact that in your mind, they still are alive and it's this surreal feeling trying to cope. And of course, you feel like no one can help you and no one knows what your going through, just like Wanda."


    "Also the scene where Wanda is explaining what her grief feels like. A wave that keeps knocking her down. Oh my God, my heart shattered, because that's exactly what it feels like."


    20. Haley trying to explain Quentin's death to her class on One Tree Hill:

    in class, Haley says she should've said that she doesn't know the point of life, not that there isn't one. She says that when something awful happens, like losing someone forever, she still wonders, then all the kids write on Q's desk
    The CW

    "When Quentin died, and Haley had to try to explain to her class of high school students how someone could do something horrible for absolutely no reason. When they all gather around Q’s desk and write a memory for him, it was so heartbreaking. Then Sam’s monologue about him when she didn’t even know him topped it off. Watching Brooke break down over his casket made me cry for hours."


    21. Elena's breakdown after Jeremy's death in The Vampire Diaries:

    Elena shouts that there's nothing in her house there for her anymore, saying it's filled with memories of the people she's lost, listing her parents, Jenna, Alaric, Jeremy, and John — she breaks down, saying it hurts and "please make it stop"
    The CW

    "The Vampire Diaries, especially when Elena was grieving after Jeremy died. You really feel the emotions [and] the intensity of the scene when she's coming to terms with the situation. I really felt the scene was done well, especially the part when she breaks down before she decides to turn her humanity switch off. I remember crying with her."


    22. The aftermath of Nell's death in The Haunting of Hill House...but also just the show as a whole:

    Shirley, on the phone, says "Well, you're wrong. Someone...they got it wrong. I mean, she was just...who told you this? He can't do that again. He can't just not tell us what happened...I told you she was in trouble. I told you to find her. I told you!"

    "The Haunting of Hill House. It's been theorized that the five Crain siblings each symbolize a stage of grief, and I definitely believe it. The emotions throughout the series felt really authentic, and the whole show is basically one big cathartic gut-punch."


    "In The Haunting of Hill House, the house represents the ease with which one can get stuck in the past following the death of a loved one. Characters who die in the house become trapped there forever, and some even choose to stay on purpose in order to perpetuate or return to the past and the people that they’ve loved and lost. Those who have had more trouble working through their grief in the series are naturally drawn to the house. It’s also worth noting that every parent who loses a child in the house stays there as well."


    23. And finally, the aftermath of Paul's death on 8 Simple Rules after John Ritter, who played him on the show, died in real life:

    Cate hugs her daughters, saying there's no right way to deal with this — Bridget says she was trying hard to be happy because if she was happy everything would be normal, and Kerry says she felt guilty that something good was happening in her life

    "8 Simple Rules, when John Ritter died in real life. The way they portrayed the grief of the family was so real because the cast were clearly grieving in real life for their father figure. Bridget feeling guilty that the last thing she said to her dad was 'I hate you' was especially poignant."


    Note: Submissions have been edited for length/clarity.