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Your 21-Step Guide To The Proper Worship Of Marion Cotillard

It's time to promote your Marion Cotillard obsession to a full-on religion.

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So, you want to worship Marion Cotillard as your lord and saviour.

Well, of course you do.
LOIC VENANCE/AFP / Getty Images

Well, of course you do.

To correctly worship Marion Cotillard, you must emulate the goddess herself, and live by her many teachings.

Thankfully, we have created a handy guide for you to become a better believer.
LOIC VENANCE/AFP / Getty Images

Thankfully, we have created a handy guide for you to become a better believer.

1. It is said that Marion Cotillard once walked on cobblestones in stilletos as if it was nothing.

Vogue / Via giphy.com

In honour of this miracle, walk only in the middle of roads, preferably with large block letters spelling your name in the air.

2. Watch La Vie en Rose twice every week, and weep openly.

Picturehouse / Via giphy.com

3. If you must ever look over your shoulder, look only over your right shoulder, and do so fabulously.

ALBERTO PIZZOLI/AFP / Getty Images
MIGUEL MEDINA/AFP / Getty Images
JASON MERRITT / Getty Images

4. Never settle.

5. You may only appear shy, uncertain, or unconfident if you are being paid a lot of money to do so, and afterwards you win an Academy Award for it.

Picturehouse / Via giphy.com

6. When you laugh, crinkle your nose so that it looks like ripples in a tranquil pond where a forsaken lover has tossed a diamond ring rejected by his beloved.

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7. Four times a day, kneel before this photo of Marion Cotillard wearing a dress made out of scrap metal, and be grateful for all that is good in the world.

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8. Enter all rooms like this.

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9. Exit all rooms like this.

Warner Independent Pictures / Via giphy.com

10. Always do this.

Vogue / Via giphy.com

11. If anybody suggests that your worship of Marion Cotillard is an illegitimate faith, your goddess commands that you make this face of utter ennui.

Sony Pictures Classics / Via giphy.com

This face will help you to identify other believers in Marion Cotillard.

12. Learn French.

Il faut que vous pratiquiez le subjonctif, or something.
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Il faut que vous pratiquiez le subjonctif, or something.

13. Make sure that everything you do is a heartbreaking work of staggering genius.

Cinéart / Via youtube.com

Everything.

14. Your goddess also commands you to protect the environment.

Like, IRL.
FRED DUFOUR/AFP / Getty Images

Like, IRL.

15. Say beautiful things about your art, and while you are thinking of them, make these thinking sounds.

vine.co / Via youtube.com

16. Every month, at the new moon, at midnight, walk through the woods until you find a circle of ancient oak trees, unsullied by man or beast. When you have found such a place, you may watch the following GIF exactly three times and rejoice:

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17. Emit a glow of inner and outer beauty; choose to cast it upon others as it suits you.

ALBERTO PIZZOLI/AFP / Getty Images

18. If you must despair, despair completely. Despair like a despairing angel.

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19. If you must weep, weep actual milk in a crazy David Bowie music video.

20. And once you're done despairing and weeping, go immediately back to being flawless.

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21. Know that you will never be worthy of Marion Cotillard, not even the mole upon her head.

Dominique Charriau / GettyImages for Dior

Because it, like her, is perfect.

Dominique Charriau / GettyImages for Dior

It is thought to be the source of all her powers.

Dominique Charriau / GettyImages for Dior

Congratulations, Marion Cotillard is now your heart, your soul, your religion, your world.

Jason Merritt / Getty Images

Bow down.

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