29 People Revealed The Red Flags That Made Them Realize They Weren't Dating Their Soulmate, And It's Absolutely Wild

    "He wouldn't stop comparing me to his stepdaughter." 🚩🚩

    Unfortunately, not all relationships have happy endings. Though some breakups come out of nowhere and leave you blindsided, others had a parade of red flags leading up to the inevitable split.

    We asked members of the BuzzFeed Community to share the relationship red flags they've encountered. Here are the painful results.

    1. "I had been texting this guy for a couple of weeks. We hadn’t even met in person yet. One day he invited me over but said I couldn't wear ANY makeup in his house. He said he hated makeup and he’d make me take it off before I came in if I showed up wearing any. Needless to say, I did not text back after that!"

    2. "I was accused of sleeping with my own brother because I didn’t want to be late to his wedding. My abusive ex always made us late to everything — usually because he would refuse to go because I did something 'wrong' and I’d have to beg him. It was a control thing. I didn't want to be late to my brother’s wedding and cause a scene. So clearly I was having an incestuous affair."

    —PHM8

    3. "I met a guy on a dating app, and he asked if he could call me after a few days of messaging. I gave him my number, and he proceeded to call me 72 times that week."

    4. "I dated a guy who was super jealous of my dog. He would get angry and pouty because I 'loved the dog more than [him].' Well, yeah, because you're a tool and my dog is awesome."

    —fernaudrey

    5. "Ten minutes into the date, while the bartender was still standing in front of us and getting us waters, he just blurted out, 'I really want to eat your asshole.' Besides greeting me and ordering drinks, it was the first thing he said to me. I got up and left. People, you do you, but maybe don't start off a date by saying you want to eat someone's ass."

    6. "He said that getting a tattoo honoring my late husband was a mistake and I'd regret it later. He was deeply jealous of him the whole time."

    —gabrielaf4804e2230

    7. "On the first date, this guy randomly asked me if I was on any medications because 'depression medication really changes a person's personality,' and he didn't believe in it."

    8. "I went on a date with a guy to a local tourist attraction. When we arrived, he said that he didn't want to actually go inside and just wanted to look from the outside. Okaaayy. As we sat in the parking lot staring out the windshield, he reached over, put his hand on my stomach, and lovingly said, 'Amy and Emily.' 1) We'd only been going out for about two weeks at this point, so this was our third or fourth date. 2) I have known since childhood that kids/motherhood is not for me, so there's that. 3) Apologies to every Amy and Emily out there, but I deeply despise both names. Needless to say, we did not have another date after that one."

    —rpepperpot

    9. "He kept comparing me with his mum and saying, 'Well, my mum does it this way,' and ‘My mum cooks it like this.' He expected me to do all the cooking and cleaning, even though we both worked full time. Beware of someone who just wants a ‘mum substitute.'"

    10. "Right after we had sex for the first time, while he was still inside me, he said, 'Well, that felt different than with the ex.'"

    —annettef43afea547

    11. "They told me they couldn't move in with me because their mom, who they lived with, told them no. We were both 30."

    12. "He got unfathomably angry at me for hugging a 12-year-old boy I’d known since he was a little kid. His reasoning: 'Well, I had crushes on older women when I was 12, so you shouldn’t lead him on.'"

    —tiffanya459433d17

    13. "It was our first (and last) vacation together. We went to Thailand and decided to split the cost of the trip equally. I fully paid for our flights and hotels because it was convenient that way, and he said that he would give me his half the following week. The following week rolled by, and he didn’t pay me. We went on the trip and he still hadn’t paid me. I was patient because we had been dating for over a year and I trusted him. During the trip, he made me pay for our taxis, food, and tourist attractions. When we were shopping, he made sure we paid separately. I started to feel like he was taking advantage of me."

    14. "He called his sister 'thick' and picked out her underwear for her. Needless to say, the relationship did not last."

    —raiganmarie17

    15. "If he noticed someone checking me out, he would immediately point out my 'flaws,' like a pimple on my face or my weight. He would also tell me when he thought another girl was prettier than I was and would always brush it off as a joke, but I knew deep down he wasn’t joking. Thank god I realized he was an insecure little dweeb!"

    16. "My then-boyfriend once broke into my house to use the restroom. He mentioned that whenever he pooped, he had to take a bath or else he didn't feel clean. I’m almost positive that he pooped, took a bath, and then chilled on my couch."

    —katieg4dfedb9cf

    17. "They insisted on reading all my college assignments to check and see if they were 'good enough.'"

    18. "After our second date, he called me to ask me how long we would have to be together before we got engaged."

    —c448255a22

    19. "My ex, who was on the older side, continually compared me to his stepdaughter from a different relationship. Like, why? I get I was her age, but still."

    20. "On the second date, they said, 'I'm so glad you are so intelligent because I couldn't deal with us having stupid kids.'"

    —justinef3

    21. "I told him I was bisexual, and he took that to mean he could bring home some random girl with no heads-up or conversation beforehand."

    22. "I should definitely have seen the red flags with this guy I went out with. He only talked about himself and never really cared for what I had to say. I’m an artist, so he asked to see some of my work, and when I showed it to him, he looked at it and then started talking about himself again. The real cherry on top was when he revealed that he wanted to do 'things' with both me and MY SISTER. Yeah, he sucked."

    —Jade

    23. "This guy took me on a date at an extremely high-end shopping center and bragged about how he could probably afford anything there, but then took me out to dinner and wrote a big fat $0 on the tip line."

    24. "He told me on the first date that his entire friend group from his first college had a restraining order against him, including his ex, so that’s how he ended up going to school in the same city as me."

    —arcticmankeys

    25. "We went on holiday together for the first time, and he constantly told me how much he wished his friends had come too."

    26. "My first boyfriend in high school would go through my phone every single time we hung out. He'd read through my text messages and check my socials. Because it was my first relationship, I figured it was normal. Plus, I never really cared because I knew I had nothing to hide. After I discussed this with my friend, she told me this was not normal at all. The next time my boyfriend and I hung out, I asked to go through his phone. Instead of obliging, he proceeded to CHUCK IT ACROSS THE ROOM. He was cheating on me the whole time."

    —Hannah

    27. "'You’re the hottest Black girl I’ve seen.' This white boy said that to me after saying he had a thing for Black girls because of our big lips, butts, and curves. No surprise, he just wanted sexual things because he viewed me and other Black girls as objects."

    28. "The first sign that my relationship was going to be a nightmare was when we watched America's Got Talent and he got mad at me for 'being attracted' to a shirtless contestant doing an acrobatic act. I had not said a single word about the guy. He just imagined the whole thing and then yelled at me for it."

    —kngreyh

    29. Finally: "My ex got mad at me and ignored me for two days because I was hospitalized for a severe allergic reaction and couldn’t make it to our date at the Cheesecake Factory."

    What lesson have we learned here today? DON'T ignore the red flags!!! 🚩 Has something similar to one of the stories above ever happened to you? Have you ever seen a big ole red flag waving in one of your relationships? What happened? Tell us your story in the comments below!

    Note: Some submissions have been edited for length and/or clarity.