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25 Things All Long-Term Couples Know To Be True

Netflix > every other option.

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1. Staying in is not just a choice, it's a sport you both have mastered to the point of an art form.

"Netflix is the hottest club in Manhattan. It has a prison full of women, mini candy bars, and a bottle of wine that will soon be totally empty." — Stefon from Saturday Night Live

3. Snuggling is great, but being completely comfortable with your separate sides of the bed is EVEN BETTER.

Especially if you're one of those people who sleeps like a starfish, being able to stay on your side is like a damn milestone.

4. You've survived the TRUE test of relationship longevity: going on a vacation together.

Vacationing can be stressful, (airports, car rides, hotel rooms, potentially shitty roadside food, etc.) and if you both make it back without hating each other, well, you might as well lock that shit down.


5. Celebrating an anniversary, even if it's just ordering in pizza, is important.

It's the little things! Especially because the longer you're together, the easier it is to forget them.

7. You will hear a horrifying body noise come from your SO, (like, you didn't even realize they were capable of it). And they will hear one come from you too.

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It's like they say, "What fart doesn't kill you, makes you both stronger." Or something.

8. You've heard the, "So, when are you two getting married?" question so many times that it's actually pretty funny now.

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Even if it's not funny, you've figured out ways to make it funny.



9. Being in a couple is a little like a weird cult, in that you inevitably develop other "couple friends."

Maybe it's that your once-single friends got shacked up, or there's a weird homing device that forms on the back of every couple. But, either way... ONE. OF. US. ONE. OF. US.

11. Love also means doing a lot of weird shit for each other.

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When your significant other gets sick, you are automatically the doctor.

Or, if you're like me, you'll watch re-runs of The X-Files, get scared shitless, and make your boyfriend check the house for aliens before going to bed. Whatever works!

12. You're so used to going everywhere with your SO that you have to make conscious efforts to have solo time with friends.

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Yes, being without your SO can and does suck, but don't be THAT friend who only goes out if their significant other does too. That friend is bullshit.


15. Your single friends will brush off any dating advice you give because you've been in a relationship for so long.

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Pro tip, though: Take advice from the people who've made this shit last, not the dude who can't seem to get a Tinder date.

16. Valentine's Day still sucks for people in relationships.

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Oh you actually have someone to love? Cool! So, I guess that means you'll be renting a helicopter filled with champagne and roses to fly over Fiji and watch the sunset while Boys II Men sings, "I'll Make Love To You" from the cockpit?


18. You've been out of the dating game so long that you either have no idea how Tinder works, or it's a hilarious slideshow for both of you.

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To be fair to the single friends asking for dating advice: We may not understand Tinder, but we do understand ~feelings~. (The love kind!)

19. Sometimes you don't have to speak in full sentences to each other, because you tend to finish each other's sentences.


Hey, you're around someone for long enough and you basically can read their minds. LIKE A SUPERHERO.


22. You've secretly tried their grooming products, either out of curiosity or desperation.

Sorry, I ran out of toothpaste, so I tried this face mask, body lotion, and a little eye cream to make it better.