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1. An egg cup holder for breakfasts so damn delicious they deserve to be knighted.
2. A plush loaf pillow that'll remind them why they love to carbo load so much when this keeps them ~toasty~ warm all night.
3. An honest T-shirt for giving them a way to explain why they spend 90% of their night in front of the party dip. The other 10% is spent on their phone ordering from GrubHub.
4. A mini waffle bowl maker so they can make an individual waffle, taco, ice cream sundae, WHATEVER bowl and have the perfect excuse why they can't share. "Minemineminemine," you hear them whisper as they intently watch their treat cook.
5. A slow-rising watermelon squishy who won't find it seedy when your friend needs to relieve some stress. But hopefully they don't get too hungry, because its fruity scent may become too much to resist. Perhaps...just a nibble...
6. A Gudetama book that'll make them wonder how all their deepest thoughts wound up in these pages. "HOW CAN THE EGG READ MY MIND," they'll yell while reading "I like food."
7. A ravioli maker to teach them what true love is: pasta stuffed with mounds of cheese. Humans are irrelevant. Parmesan can't leave — it doesn't have any legs.
8. A set of macaron soaps for what they wish would have been fed to them every time they cursed as a child.
9. A pair of demanding socks so people don't have to read their mind to see into their sole. Honestly the day the they're not thinking about bacon, pigs will fly.
10. A soft tortilla blanket, because they'll need the proper tools in order to *truly* create their ideal bed burrito. Will they dream of tacos? Absolutely.
11. A BuzzFeed Tasty cookbook that'll help them recreate all the meals they drool over when watching 10,000 food videos on their phone. *Rewatches for fifth time* *In slow-mo* *Takes screenshot*
12. A bottle of spicy honey for making just about everything they eat extra flavorful — aka this may ~literally~ bring tears to their eyes.
13. A kawaii coloring book filled with adorable images of comfort food so you can warm their hearts while they presumably also fill their stomachs. It's called multitasking.
14. A pizza nightlight, because this'll be the last thing they see when they fall asleep and the first thing the think of when they wake up. Get out of here, Romeo, THIS is romance.
15. A mini Le Creuset cocotte to fulfill their fantasies of owning this fancy shmancy brand and eating everything with their pinky up.
16. A cute crossbody purse that'll technically fit some fruit into their day....as they wear this on the way to the ice cream shop for second lunch.
17. A meal-planning pad for making it seem like you don't already know they eat at least 10 meals a day. "Oh wow, this'll really help me plan my one dinner," they'll say. And you'll just nod.
18. An enamel pin so they have always have a fellow eating enthusiast close by when trying to get through at least one hour without snacking at work. "YOU'RE RIGHT, MR. CAT, LIFE IS SHORT." *Stuffs face*.
19. A trio lasagna pan, because only people who don't love themselves limit themselves to just ONE kind of pasta. Pity them. But don't share.
20. A comforting candle reminiscent of Grandma's kitchen (hello, butter, cinnamon, and vanilla) for everyone who's a little *salty* with their roommates, because they don't bake them cookies every night.
21. A pair of enticing underwear so they'll know you think it's funny how slow they are to share their food — no ifs, ands, or butts.
22. A set of dinosaur cookie cutters, because their love of baked goods will obviously never go extinct. If a meteor were to hit this earth, they would save the fridge and the fridge only.
23. A portable mini crock pot that'll ensure their *chef kisses fingers* meals they worked so hard on the night before will last into lunch time the next day. And no, you can't have any, SUSAN.
24. A peanut butter and jelly matching sweatshirt set for showing the world how you guys became best friends — bonding over food. The only argument you've ever had is who gets the bigger half of the sandwich.
25. A foldable nylon tote so they can fashionably carry SEVERAL meals without worrying about staining their purse. This is also a wonderful excuse to stop at the grocery store on their way to the restaurant.
26. A DIY sushi kit, because they're starting to empty their savings account in the name of takeout tuna rolls. Better they learn how to make their own and save the moolah for other things, like cake.
27. A noodle bowl and chopstick set that'll really clear the air of what they meant when you thought they said "send nudes". They wanted NOODLES, get your head out of the gutter.
28. A four-in-one cutlery tool with a carrying pouch for giving them a truly life-changing gift: the ability to eat someone else's food at all times. You've created a monster.
29. A pair of printed pajamas so they can always have ~sweet dreams~ — probably about cherry sundaes. Some people count sheep, they count sprinkles.
30. An Instant Pot to help them easily make seemingly gourmet meals with one simple step: dump everything into the slow cooker. First recipe: Kevin's homemade chili — everyone is going to get to know each other in the pot.
31. An inspiring tote bag, because they'll realize they DO work out a lot — they push forward when everyone else feels "too full." WEAKLINGS.
32. An ingenious nonstick pan that'll make them feel on top of the freaking WORLD when every single brownie is perfectly crisp. Talk about living the high life.
33. A Winky Lux matcha lip balm for adding some flavor to their life whenever they need to hydrate their pucker. We don't put anything near our mouths unless it tastes good, ok?
34. A punny 2019 calendar so they can start every day with their favorite sense of humor — really anything centered around something edible.
35. An attachable ring light, because it's time they make their dreams of becoming a food blogger a reality. They already take 10,000 pictures of food — shouldn't they be Insta quality?
36. A Glow Recipe avocado sleep mask that'll use the power of everyone's favorite super food to nourish their skin overnight. If the desire for a midnight snack becomes too much and they have a taste off their face, it's all-natural so they won't die. Just saying — you can never be too sure with them.
37. A pair of wooden earrings for anyone who doesn't know what came first: their love of breakfast or their enormous grocery bill. We know the answer, but we'll let them ponder.
38. An eater's guide to 1,000 local restaurant favorites from coast to coast so when they inevitably begin their quest to find THE best curly fry, they're in good hands.
When you read their Tinder bio and find:
Still shopping? ALWAYS. Look no further:
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