Robert Pattinson Is Our New Batman And I, For One, Am Over The Moon

    I am here for R. Patz's evolution from Manbat to Batman.

    ICYMI, the people of Gotham/fans of DC have a new Batman: Mr. Robert Douglas Thomas Pattinson.

    R. Patz will star in a new Batman trilogy, which will be directed by Matt Reeves. The first of the three, The Batman, is slated to release in 2021.

    When this news ~officially~ broke — it was touch 'n' go there for a bit — I, for one, was over the moon.

    So when I hopped on social media, I was a lil' gobsmacked to find that people weren't gung-ho for Patzman as our new Batman:

    Oof Robert Pattinson as Batman, I’m not that mad but also very intrigued

    I need yall to stop hyping up Robert Pattinson as Batman. You know damn well that is a bad idea and I'm mad af people want to ruin the Wayne legacy. He is worse than Clooney #facts

    No no no no no! Horrid choice horrid choice #NOTMYBATMAN lmao 🤣

    So, allow me to present to you: A Case For Robert Pattinson As Batman.

    For starters, he's already played a vampire. So he's used to the bat motif.

    While playing said vampire, he picked up some useful fighting moves.

    Oh, but Batman is brooding and moody. Rob can be broody and moody!

    Yeah, but Batman is low-key a criminal who fights for the people he loves and the people of Gotham. Yup, Rob's done that too.

    What about the unmatched bond between Batman and Alfred? Well, Rob knows a thing or two about iconic duos.

    OK, OK, but Batman, despite the brooding and the fighting, Batman is simply a man in love with a woman — regardless of how unhealthy that love is. I'm telling y'all, Rob's got that covered, too!

    It all boils down to this: INTENSITY. Which Rob has in SPADES.

    You want more intensity?

    Can't get more intense than this!

    Yes, Robert Pattinson made waves early on in his career as everyone's vampire-boyfriend. But, he's since been in over a dozen films which have, quite literally, prepared him for this new role as Bruce Wayne.

    From Manbat to Batman, R. Patz's career truly has been a rollercoaster. Can't wait to see him soar in this new role, come 2021!

    I hope Robert Pattinson pulls a Heath Ledger in the new Batman just so he can shut all of you whiny motherfuckers up.

    ┏┓ ┃┃╱╲ in this ┃╱╱╲╲ house ╱╱╭╮╲╲ we ▔▏┗┛▕▔ accept ╱▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔╲ Robert Pattinson as our Batman ╱╱┏┳┓╭╮┏┳┓ ╲╲ ▔▏┗┻┛┃┃┗┻┛▕▔