18 Extremely Disappointing Facts About “Healthy” Foods

Every single food you eat is terrible for you, most likely.

1. Granola.

Far too much sugar and far too little fiber. One cup could have 600 calories. You might as well just eat candy for breakfast — it’ll be a lot nicer.

2. Low-fat yogurt.

These tasty little things are packed with artificial sweeteners to make up for all the calories they had to take out.

3. Vitamin water.

A better name for this would be Sugar Water. You may as well be drinking a Coke.

4. Turkey bacon.

Turkey bacon: It’s just like regular bacon, except it has a higher sodium count and more additives.

5. Trail mix.

Most store-brand trail mixes are essentially delivery mechanisms for salt and sugar. Some handfuls have over 300 calories. Did you really think something with that many M&Ms in it was going to be good for you?

6. Reduced-fat peanut butter.

“Reduced-fat” peanut butter has more carbs, sodium, and sugars than regular creamy peanut butter.

7. Veggie burgers.

Textured vegetable protein, hydrolyzed vegetable protein, five different kinds of corn products, and two different kinds of MSG = lots of carbs and sodium.

8. Light salad dressing.

Regular salad dressing helps your body absorb carotenoids, which reduce your risk of cancer and heart disease. The light stuff may have fewer calories, but it also has fewer health benefits. Isn’t that why you were eating a salad in the first place?

9. Diet frozen dinners.

Low in fiber, high in sodium, and barely any nutritional value. Why not just eat the box?

10. V8 juice.

A single 11.5-ounce can has one-third of your recommended daily sodium intake. They’re good for Bloody Marys, though!

11. Diet soda.

Artificial sweeteners can fool your body and make you crave real sugar even more.

12. Muffins.

Just because you eat it for breakfast and it has fruit in it doesn’t mean it’s healthy. It’s only one step away from being a cupcake.

13. Veggie chips.

Once veggies are processed into chips they lose a lot of what made them good for you in the first place. These bad boys have roughly the same number of calories as regular chips.

14. Activia.

More sugar than a can of Coke.

15. Baked chips.

These are actually way more processed than regular chips. These are good if you want more high-fructose corn syrup in your diet (which normal potato chips don’t generally have).

16. Breakfast cereals.

There are 19 grams of sugar in one cup of Raisin Bran. It’s like Capt’n Crunch went undercover as a raisin.

17. Multigrain bread.

Whole wheat has more essential nutrients and more dietary fiber, so unless your multigrain bread is made with whole grains, you’re better off with white bread.

18. Bottled green tea.

61 grams of sugar in a bottle. :(

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