back to top

26 Things You Learn When You Date Someone Who Loves Harry Potter

They'll stay with you until the very end.

Posted on

1. Their bookshelf looks like this.

To make room for your own books, claim a corner and call it "The Restricted Section."

2. And their jewelry box looks like this.

Take. Note.

3. They're loyal, smart, brave, and resourceful.

Harry Potter has taught them pretty much every life lesson they know. YOU'RE WELCOME.

4. You never have to worry about what to give them for Christmas.

Chelsey Pippin / BuzzFeed

Bertie Bott's and an invisibility cloak if you can swing it pls, but if all else fails, a very cosy jumper with their initials on it will do.


5. And this is one of the sweetest things they can say to you.

The greatest love story of our time, that BS Sunday Times story aside.

7. The way to their heart is obscure book knowledge.

Step One: Read the books.

Step Two: Choose the right ship.

Step Three: Fall on the correct side of the the Snape debate.

Step Four: Win their heart.


9. And you can always count on them to throw a magical party.

Getting drunk and trying to do spells with their limited Collector's Edition wand is actually really fun.

10. You know adding a touch of magic to their morning coffee earns you serious points.

You might even win the House Cup if you order them the Butterbeer Latte off the Starbucks secret menu.

11. You probably haven't talked about kids yet, but they've got already got the JK Rowling-inspired names picked out.

Don't worry, none of them will ever stoop so low as to name their kids Albus fucking Severus, but Hermione will be in there somewhere, just accept it.


13. You've tagged along with them on at least one Harry Potter pilgrimage.

The food at the Wizarding World of Harry Potter is actually DELICIOUS, though, so no bust.

15. Even though you both know they win EVERY TIME.

You: How am I supposed to know what floor of the Ministry of Magic the Department of Mysteries is on, I mean, WTF?


16. Because they infuse everything in their life with Harry Potter references.

Sex definitely involves references to your wand, basilisk, or Chamber of Secrets.


17. Like, you can't get through a conversation without a sneaky (or not so sneaky) nod to the Wizarding World.

Every time you watch a TV show, they'll point out which actors have connections to the Harry Potter films.

18. But they will LOVE you if you play along.

It's like that time Hermione made out with Ron when he started to care about house-elves.

19. You don't really understand A Very Potter Musical, but you're used to it being on YouTube in the background.

You do know that Hufflepuffs are particularly good finders for some reason?


21. And they are honest to god still waiting for that sweet Hogwarts letter.

Or even a Daily Prophet. A fucking Howler would do at this point.

22. But they'll settle for a Potter proposal.


24. They are always bragging about how *real* of a fan they are.

It's not even fair really, because even if you got into it now, out of pure love for them, they'd just take the piss out of you for being a latecomer. Slytherin move, I know.

25. Their perfect date is staying in for a Harry Potter weekend.


26. And the most romantic thing you can say to them in the entire fucking world is "Always."

It ALWAYS works. Until the very end.