1. When Jennifer was acting her ass off in Cake.
2. When Angelina was busy being sick as shit in Maleficent.
4. When Angelina was appointed as an honorary citizen of Sarajevo after her film In The Land of Blood And Honey raised awareness of the Bosnian War.
"Wonder if Jennifer is aware of my new citizenship."
6. When, after 10 years of service, Angelina was promoted from a UNHCR goodwill ambassador to special envoy to High Commissioner António Guterres.
7. When Jen was busy banging her hot boyfriend.
8. When Angelina was shagging the shit out of Brad Pitt – probably while he was wearing this hat.
9. While Jennifer is planning her wedding to her hot boyfriend.
10. When Angelina was having this beautiful moment with Neema Namadamu, the founder of Maman Shujaa, the "women’s movement for Peace in Congo".
11. While Jen was busy promoting expensive bottled water with her hot, naked body.
12. When Angelina was busy being a fucking badass with Brad Pitt and former British Foreign Secretary William Hague at the Global Summit to End Sexual Violence in Conflict in London.
13. When Jen was busy making crazy money from selling lotion.
14. When Angelina was visiting Colombian refugees in Ecuador as part of her role as a UNHCR special envoy.
15. When Jen did an important Q&A at the American Cinematheque while wearing these glasses.
16. When Angelina stood like this, wearing this dress.
17. When Jen won the Vanguard Award from GLAAD.
18. When Angelina was busy being ordained as an honorary dame by the queen of fucking England.
19. When Jen attended the "Artists For Haiti" fundraiser dinner and hugged Susan Sarandon.
20. When Angelina was smiling and chatting with Eddie Redmayne and then he put his arm around her waist and they smiled for the camera like this.
"Yet another beautiful man that no doubt prefers me, Jennifer."