It’s absolutely no secret that men grow up fearing being perceived as not "manly enough." And while we know those fears stem from fragile masculinity, that whole construct only exists because society reinforces it. This leads to men constantly being told their whole lives about what things they shouldn’t do because it could lead people into thinking they’re weak or even…gay.
And let's be honest, a lot of the things men are told not to do, say, or feel because they might be perceived as gay are just plain silly. In fact, some things they're told not to do are downright confusing.
Well, last year, Reddit user Biscuitgod1 wanted to know just that and even had a thread go viral after he asked: "Straight men of Reddit, what is the strangest thing you have been told not to do because 'that's gay'?"
1. "Rejected a girl's advances. She said that I must suck more dick than her. I told her we're about equal at 0."
2. "When I was a kid, my dad called me a sissy because I cut a sandwich diagonally."
3. "Sing a Lily Allen song during karaoke."
4. "Buying a white iPhone."
5. "Sunscreen. One of my friends told me that sunscreen is 'gay.' The UV was 11."
6. "Not a straight man, but back in my bartending days, I asked a man if he wanted to see a dessert menu. He said, 'If I wanted dessert, I'd order wings like a real man.' Weird flex, but okay."
7. "I've been criticized for knowing how to sew and cook. Those are essential life skills!"
8. "This one time, at summer camp, this guy who'd just been swimming in the lake told me you could tell how cold the water was by how hard his nipples were. 'But don't stare too long,' he said, 'because that's gay.' You were the one who told me to look in the first place!"
9. "Using turn signals. And not as some sort of euphemism, but literally using them while driving to turn or change lanes."
10. "Play as a female video game character."
11. "When I was 10 or so, I brought an umbrella to school on a rainy day with the colors red, yellow, green, and blue. My dad of all people told me to never use that umbrella again because the colors too closely resembled a rainbow, which stood for homosexuality. I was fucking 10, I was far from puberty and had no idea. I just wanted to stay dry and grabbed the only umbrella available at the time."
12. "I left a pickup basketball game because I had an appointment to get a haircut. Evidently, the only straight way to get a haircut is as a walk-in."
13. "I was told that using the word 'assumption' made me gay. This guy thought big words made me an intellectual and in his mind: intellectual = gay."
14. "My best friend is vegetarian. Not even vegan, he eats cheese and eggs still. Anyhow, everyone asks if he's gay when they learn this. It's absurd."
15. "Use a straw. Bear in mind, I was drinking boba tea."
16. "Order a Shirley Temple."
17. "I used to sit with one leg over the other and got called gay. I wore a turtleneck with a cardigan and got called gay. Funnily enough, I tried not to be gay by emulating my macho brother, who then came out at 27."
18. "Listening to an ABBA song."
19. "Eating fruits and vegetables. I just...?"
20. "One of my wife's friends was splitting up from her boyfriend. Apparently, all was okay until they moved in together, then his slobbish ways were too much. One of his things was constant skid marks in his underwear. It seems he thought that wiping his arse properly was 'for gays.'"
21. "I don’t remember what I said, but I had complimented a friend about something on Tumblr about a decade ago. Someone messaged me warning me to be careful 'cause people might think I was gay — for just being polite and saying something nice to a friend of mine!"
22. "Eat a banana or a hot dog. Apparently, eating food you like in some type of way or picking it because you're trying to save some money means you're 'gay.' Sometimes people say something in passing and they need to mind their own business."
23. "Let’s see if I can remember all of them: driving a convertible, drinking hot tea, having a cat, wearing a sweater, showering daily, keeping cigarettes in a cigarette case, wearing shorts, and wearing shoes other than work boots."
24. "So, I mostly drink wine when I'm out at bars and restaurants, etc. It's because when I got to legal drinking age, doctors just found out I had celiacs — so beer is off the table. Apparently, if you're a guy drinking wine, you're gay!"
And finally...
25. "Not me, because I'm gay. But apparently, when my straight guy friends talk with me, people think they are gay. Like, what?"
You can read the full thread of responses on Reddit.
Note: Some responses have been edited for length and/or clarity.