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    19 People Share Their Most Memorably Cringeworthy Thanksgivings, And I Have Exactly Zero Words

    "My stepgrandmother accidentally used laundry powder instead of sugar in the apple pie."

    Not too long ago, we shared a series of posts in which people told us about their worst — and most hilariously cringeworthy — Thanksgiving (see them here and here). Here are the most memorable responses, along with a few new responses from our readers that are equally horrifying:

    1. "We were hosting our first Thanksgiving in our new house when our plumbing failed so badly that sewage was backing up into the shower. So guests who had to use the bathroom had to either go down the street to the gas station or PEE IN OUR BACKYARD!

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    "It was a really great time, though, all things considered!"

    —Sarah Melius, Facebook

    2. "One Thanksgiving, my father — who was drunk — stole the Thanksgiving turkey and ran through the trailer with it holding it like a football and screaming, 'See ya later, fuckers!'

    "Then he tried to squeeze out of the window and got stuck. Six hours, one shattered window, and four firemen later, he was free."

    —Nichole Schaffer, Facebook

    3. "My friend was tasked with making the pumpkin pie. She wasn't a good baker, but she worked really hard and was pleasantly surprised that it turned out so nice. Well, she noticed people making faces while eating the pie, so she took a bite of the pie herself...

    "That's when it dawned on her that she'd confused the cans of condensed milk with CANS OF BABY FORMULA! She was never allowed to cook the pie again."

    —Zeon Kitty, Facebook

    4. "My stepgrandmother accidentally used laundry powder instead of sugar in the apple pie."

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    —Megan Trainor, Facebook

    5. "My uncle had found out that his wife was messing around with his nephew. Well, at the Thanksgiving dinner table, he drunkenly stood up, clanged his fork against a mayo jar filled with beer, and toasted to his divorce!

    "My grandma was mortified."

    —Korey Bishop, Facebook

    6. "The day before Thanksgiving, my family all got food poisoning, and the seven of us spent Thanksgiving throwing up and shitting ourselves in a house with one bathroom."

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    7. "My mom baked the green bean casserole with the lid of the can in it.

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    "Years later, we still give her shit for it."

    —Allyson Ayala, Facebook

    8. "My dog stole the turkey off the counter and dragged it down the hallway, we forgot to pick up my brother from the train station, and my great-grandmother got drunk and tried to race the kids down the hallway in a rolling computer chair."

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    9. "When I was in high school, my mom scheduled me to have my wisdom teeth removed on the first day of Thanksgiving break so that I could recover while I was out of school. The only thing I had for Thanksgiving dinner was Jell-O and resentment."

    —Mikiko Hillyer, Facebook

    10. "At Thanksgiving dinner years ago, there was a huge family fight and my uncle angrily chopped the turkey in half and left carrying his half."

    11. "My ex-husband tried to open a can of cranberry sauce by puncturing it with a sharp knife. The knife slipped and went straight through his hand, and we had to make a trip to the ER."

    —Patricia Hibbard, Facebook

    12. "I was feeling queasy one Thanksgiving when I was about 5, so I only took one bite of my turkey leg. Well, my grandma didn't like that one bit. The next Thanksgiving, everyone got a full, freshly cooked spread...and I got a turkey leg with one bite taken out of it from out of the freezer."

    theKatherine

    13. "My dad tried to fry the turkey and went a little too crazy."

    14. "My aunt's creepy husband made a speech thanking my cousin's new boyfriend (who was meeting us for the first time) for dating her, all while standing up and sobbing."

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    15. "I stepped on a toothpick that was stuck in the carpet, and it stayed in my foot for six months!

    "The toothpick didn't show up on the X-ray or ultrasound, and I had two surgeries in which the doctor couldn't find it. He said it must have dissolved."

    —Erin Bierley, Facebook

    16. "I put a glass pan of sweet potatoes on a hot burner, and the pan exploded...right into the dressing.

    Suzanne Thorpe Mikus

    "One mistake, two side dishes down."

    —Suzanne Thorpe Mikus, Facebook

    17. "One Thanksgiving, my grandfather punched my uncle's friend when he wouldn't take off his hat."

    —Shaun McGahey, Facebook

    18. "My grandmother decided to cook a low-carb, low-fat, zero-sugar meal for Thanksgiving to be healthier...without telling anyone.

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    "And we were only offered water to drink."

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    And last, a Thanksgiving whose memories led to new traditions:

    19. "One year, my nana sat us all down and went on a weird rant about how expensive margarine was, and then she jumped up and started throwing bread at us!

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    "But that family bread fight became a holiday tradition for many years afterward."

    —Sommer Haney, Facebook

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    Note: Some submissions have been edited for length and/or clarity.

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