We Know What Unnecessary Chore Your Parents Will Make You Do By Your Zodiac Sign
“But-” you’ll say as your mom hands you the feather duster, “it’s not even dirty!” But it doesn’t matter. Company is coming. You must dust.
Because apparently just washing the forks isn’t good enough. No doubt your aunt’s holiday would be totally ruined if she had to eat turkey with an unpolished fork.
Bitch, you thought you were done vacuuming when you finished the floors? You haven’t even started on pillows yet! They better be looking straight outta IKEA when you’re through!
Hurry up, your cousins will be here in two hours, and those pillows need to look FULL and PLUMP! People need to think your family’s never used these pillows in their lives!
Is that the shirt you’re wearing to dinner? No no no no no no. It’s positively covered in wrinkles. Get that to the ironing board and don’t come back until you look like you’re wearing cardboard.
Wiping down the table with water isn’t NEARLY good enough. You need to get that table smelling lemony fresh with some wood polish ASAP or else dinner is CANCELLED.
Obviously if you don’t clean the miniscule amount of dirt on the lamp shades, it will be so dim in the living room that your extended family won’t be able to see a thing and will probably all die.
What if one of your cousins wants to read one of the books but there’s a thin layer of dust there and he CAN’T? Hurry up, dust them all, they’ll be here any minute!!!
Because if the windows are dirty, the neighbors won’t be able to peer in and see what an obsessively spotless house your family has.
You might think that an area of your home that literally no one ever sees wouldn’t need to be cleaned, but you thought wrong. What if the fridge falls down and everyone sees how dirty it is back there? How embarrassing.
You never know when someone is going to bend down to tie their shoe, only to be totally revolted by dirty floor moulding. Get scrubbing!
No you can’t just fold them in half, this is a family dinner not a Taco Bell! These delicate instruments need to look perfect before everyone wipes their spit on them.