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17 Moments Everyone With A Vagina Has Experienced While Masturbating

*Accomplishes one small task* TIME FOR A MASTURBATION BREAK.

1. When you're bored so you might as well ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

3 Arts Entertainment / Via

Like, you're not exactly horny, but you have nothing better to do, so...orgasm?

2. When everyone's home and you have to be stealthy AF

Stacking a million pillows and blankets on top of yourself to mute the sound of your vibrator isn't exactly ideal, but what else are you going to do, let everyone listen to the dulcet sounds of your orgasm?

3. And when no one's home so you can actually make some damn noise for once

Fox Searchlight / Via

Long, uninterrupted stretches of time to yourself are rare and sacred when you don't live alone. And tbh, the only real way to celebrate that is to turn up the volume on your porn and actually let out a moan for once.

4. When you wind up thinking about someone you'd definitely rather not think about

FOX / Via

No matter what fantasy you start out with, every once in a while someone completely random pops up and hijacks your fantasy, and THERE YOU ARE, ACCIDENTALLY MASTURBATING TO SOMEONE YOU'VE NEVER THOUGHT ABOUT IN A SEXUAL CONTEXT BEFORE.

5. When your vibrator's battery fails at the most inopportune moment

FOX / Via

Of all the terrible-but-not-life-threatening things that can happen to you, your vibrator battery dying when you're THISCLOSE has got to be at least #4.

6. When you knocked one thing off your to-do list and have to reward your hard work

HBO / Via

*Accomplishes one small task* Time for a masturbation break.

7. When you're on your period and have to make some important choices

Warner Bros. / Via

You're not about to let your period stop you from masturbating, but let's be real, it requires a little preparation. Are you going to put down towels so you don't leave a crime scene behind, or are you going to stick to the clit and avoid the mess altogether? Choices, choices.

8. When everything sucks and you just need some endorphins.

Dreamworks / Via

Cry then masturbate. Masturbate then cry. Cry WHILE masturbating. EMBRACE THE SADSTURBATION, IT'S ALL GOOD.

9. When the porn is kind of questionable, but you're kind of curious

NBC / Via

This masturbation session is more experimental than pleasurable in nature — you're not suuuure a clip is your kink exactly, but you're willing to check it out and see if you can get off to it. You know, for science.

10. When you have nothing better to do than rack up multiple orgasms

HBO / Via

Listen, sometimes you just have a long stretch of free time and a can-do attitude, so why not see how many consecutive orgasms you can have?

11. When you're in the shower and want to see what all the fuss is about

12. When you low-key make your clit go numb thanks to the highest setting on your vibrator

Disney / Via

Cranking the vibration all the way up is not for the faint of heart and will definitely exhaust your nerve endings for a good hour, but sometimes you just want to see if you can make yourself come in three seconds flat, okay?

13. When you need to put yourself to sleep

E! / Via Anna Borges / BuzzFeed

What else are you going to do? Stare at the ceiling until you doze off?

14. When you need to get creative and do some desperate DIY

Leisuretime70 / Getty Images / Via

Throwback to those dark times when your hands just weren't doing it for you, but you didn't have the means to acquire your own sex toy. You don't have to be crafty to have an eye for household items that can double as sex toys.

15. When you have a hot date with a new toy

@aeriesroom / Via

ANTICIPATION IS HIGH. Will it have been worth the money? Will it actually get you off? Are all the promises of the multiple orgasms you read in reviews true??? TIME TO FIND OUT.

16. When your hand cramps up but you valiantly carry on

You're not about to quit before you get off.

17. And finally, when you seduce the fuck out of yourself because you're worth it

Hit-boy / Via

Sometimes you just have to treat yourself to a nice night of lovemaking, even if you don't have anyone to join you. Mood lighting, music, foreplay...maybe even some goddamn candles, because why not?

  1. So, have you had these ~masturbation moments~?

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Looks like we are having a problem on the server.
So, have you had these ~masturbation moments~?
    vote votes
    Yup, all of them
    vote votes
    Most of them, yeah
    vote votes
    Only a few
    vote votes
    No, but now I'm going to try them
    vote votes
    Actually, I'm a person with a penis here out of curiosity
    vote votes
    Uh, no, wtf

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