PatriceVia ThinkstockStacyVia ThinkstockCathyVia ThinkstockShannonVia ThinkstockKimVia ThinkstockSusanVia ThinkstockMeredithVia ThinkstockAngelaVia ThinkstockAlisonVia ThinkstockJackieVia ThinkstockCassandraVia ThinkstockJamieVia Thinkstock
Can You Tell Which Of These Moms Is DTF?
Everyone at book club knows Susan is thirsty AF, but she never follows through, just like she never followed through on her master’s degree.
Cathy is the most-hated mom at PTA meetings. She dresses like she’s DTF, but really she’s committed to her successful, handsome husband, which only makes people hate her even more.
Patrice is satisfied reading 50 Shades on her Kindle and going home to her entirely average husband.
Stacy's first love is and always will be these fucking tomatoes.
Shannon has been lurking hard for a minute and she’s finally ready to ditch these transition lenses and go to town, no questions asked.
Kim is feeling herself, but she is NOT feeling you.
Meredith may have given you a little extra attention during your first yoga class, but her and her partner Klaus have been sharing tantric orgasms for almost a decade now. She has no use for a mere mortal like you.
Angela hasn’t been outside since Desperate Housewives was canceled.
Ever since Alison learned about sexting from a USA Today article, she won’t stop blowing up your phone, but she’s still too shy to lock it up IRL.
Jackie is down to pound here, there, anywhere. Just give her a knowing nod and meet her in the janitor’s closet in five minutes.
Cassandra might be DTF if her mind and body weren’t completely numbed by a steady diet of prescription pills.
Ever since the boys started playing soccer, Jamie's had a lot more free time to work on her scrapbooking. She's probably spent a little too much money at Hobby Lobby, but it's totally worth it, THESE ARE MEMORIES THAT WILL LAST A LIFETIME.