Dixie D'Amelio Got Candid About Her Mental Health Issues And Getting Help

    "I was like, 'Would I be doing more people a favor if I wasn't here?'"

    Alex Gurley
    by Alex Gurley

    BuzzFeed Contributor

    She has over 20 million followers, so it's no surprise that Dixie D'Amelio has encountered her share of haters across the internet. But just how much it's affected her might come as a shock to fans.

    In the latest episode of 2 Chix, the podcast she hosts with younger sister Charli, Dixie got extremely candid about the mental health struggles she's been facing for "months."

    "I've been getting a lot of hate lately for how I present myself on the internet. I have explosions of emotions due to some health things I have. I have outbursts of anger, and emotion, and talk without thinking because I have other things going on in my body that I can't control," Dixie explained.

    D'Amelio Family / Via youtube.com

    Although she didn't speak about specific instances, Dixie recently faced criticism for her attitude during a family dinner that was shared on YouTube.

    Dixie went on to say that she recently broke down and hit a low where she felt "guilty for being alive."

    Dixie D'Amelio / Via youtube.com

    "I just feel guilty for every single thing I do, for every opportunity I have. I broke down the other day. I was like, 'Would I be doing more people a favor if I wasn't here?' I'm not trying to...for sympathy or anything, I just want to be real. That's how I'm feeling. I just feel guilty for being alive sometimes, for something I can't control," Dixie said.

    Because of her mental health struggles, Dixie explained that she can come across as "bratty" or "ungrateful," but she says that's far from the truth.

    Thankfully, with the help of doctors, Dixie has been able to make some progress and is now on medication for her health issues.

    Charli, who has also been candid about her mental health issues, shared her complete support for Dixie.

    Dixie D'Amelio / Via youtube.com

    "Everyone says they're a mental health advocate until someone who has a following speaks on what they're struggling with in their life and they're like, 'Well, your life is perfect, we weren't talking about you,'" Charli explained.

    She continued, "You may have things and may not even want to talk about it, but you're being brave and talking about things you don't feel comfortable talking about yet because you want to explain to everyone that it's something you have to deal with every single day. It doesn't matter how many followers I have or how much money I have. This still affects me. I feel like people need to be more understanding."

    Charli also shared that the medication she is taking has been helping her.

    Messenger / Via Facebook: watch

    "I feel like I'm doing so much better now. I recently got on some medication that's helped me, and I haven't been having crazy mood swings where one thing sets it off and suddenly my life is falling apart. ... I was in a very bad place where something in my brain switched in a second. I break down and can't help it. But I'm doing a lot better," Charli said, noting that time away from social media has also helped her.

    And at the end of the day, the duo want their fans to remember that you never truly know what someone else is going through, so you should always act with kindness.

    Listen to Dixie and Charli's entire conversation on 2 Chix.

    The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is 1-800-273-8255. Other international suicide helplines can be found at befrienders.org. The Trevor Project, which provides help and suicide-prevention resources for LGBTQ youth, can be reached at 1-866-488-7386. You can also text TALK to 741741 for free, anonymous 24/7 crisis support in the US and UK from the Crisis Text Line.