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15 Things People With Unisex Names Know To Be True

Calling every Billy, Frankie, Jamie, Jordan, and Stevie.

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1. You find yourself dealing with people who insist your name is either "definitely a boys' name" or "only a girls' name."

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What are you, like, a name scientist? Some sort of genius name professor?

2. Chances are, having a unisex name makes it more likely to have a fellow Alex, Chris, or Sam at work, in school, or among your group of friends.

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...Which means a chorus of "" every time someone calls your name.

3. You know from experience that personalized novelty items are forged in hell.

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You know the struggle of finding a name key chain or novelty tiny license plate or personalized fanny pack, only to find that it's decorated with stereotypical "boyish" or "girly" designs like race cars or flowers -- usually whichever one you didn't want on your personalized fanny pack.

4. You know it's that much harder to find a song with your name in it to sing to yourself.

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Into a hairbrush. Alone. It's fine.


8. Since some unisex names have a sort of "ebb and flow" when it comes to whether they're more closely associated with male or females, sometimes you have to patiently deal with being the only guy in a sea of girls with your name, or vice-versa.


9. ...And you likely have one famous person with your name that's your go-to when pointing out that you're not "weird" for having the name you do.

10. If your name has alternate spellings -- like Tony or Toni -- you may find that people are forever getting it wrong.

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Be patient with them, and think of how many people spelled "Zeus" or "Beyoncé" wrong on the first try.

11. Sometimes you'll deal with people giving you an impromptu history lesson on your name's masculine or feminine origins.

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And it's just, like, do you think we've never Googled our own names before? Constantly?


15. ...Or you've wondered what would happen if you married someone with your same name and then all your kids had your name too.

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Would that be cute? It would be cute, right? Asking for a friend. Who happens to have my name.