1. OK, let's start things off with FOOD. You'll find it's pretty tough to find good Cuban restaurants in most cities.
Every time someone places chipotle mayo on a Cuban sandwich, an angel loses his wings while yelling "no es fácil."
2. ... And that's it's particularly impossible to find a good frita place.
My kingdom for a proper frita and a Jupiña!
3. And you're not sure most people have ever REALLY tried coffee.
Coffee is supposed to knock the wind out of you and make you speak in tongues, not just gently tickle you awake. The hell, man.
4. You get inordinately excited to point out when famous people are Cuban.
DID YOU KNOW GINA TORRES IS CUBAN? DID YOU KNOW OSCAR ISAAC'S DAD IS CUBAN? Because you're gonna.
5. You feel a tingle of pride whenever you see this marvelous dude.
That's revolutionary, journalist, author, and iconic mustache-haver José Martí, living it up in Central Park.
6. You need to take a moment whenever people mistakenly assume Che is Cuban.
Nope.
7. People will inform that you don't "look Cuban."
If a Cuban doesn't look Cuban, then what does a Cuban look like? If a Cuban falls in the forest and no one tells her she isn't really Cuban, did it ever actually happen?
8. You know that this isn't a "pastry." It's a religion.
Flaky and sweet, pastelitos de guayaba are truly transcendent.
9. You'll sometimes have to explain that Cubans in the U.S. don't *all* live in Miami.
There are particularly large Cuban communities in parts of New Jersey and California, among other places.
10. You'll deal with people's assumptions about your political beliefs, particularly when it comes to the embargo.
Republican, Democrat, Independent, Tired of It All, there's no one way that any population votes.
11. Among the first questions people will ask when they find out you're Cuban is "HAVE YOU BEEN?"
That's a question that can get tOuChY.
12. ... And this is often just an excuse for people to tell you all about their own trip to Cuba.
This essay explains why that can often be uncomfortable.
13. ... And to make a joke about cigars.
*Eye roll*
14. People will assume you're Catholic.
Cubans practice a number of religions and there's quite a sizable population of Jewish Cubans.
15. ... Or that you practice Santería.
Not everyone practices it, and it's nothing like you've seen on TV and in movies.
16. You'll find that people are shocked to learn there are Cubans of Chinese descent.
Yup, Cuba was once home to a sizable Chinese population and Havana still has a Chinatown. Shown is Cuban artist Wifredo Lam, who was of Chinese and Congolese descent.
17. It's VERY rare to see Cubans portrayed on TV.
Although Melissa Fumero is currently kicking ass as Amy Santiago on Brooklyn Nine-Nine.
18. ... So you reminisce about ¿Qué Pasa, USA?
A fully bilingual (and hilarious) sitcom about a Cuban family adjusting to life in the U.S.
19. ... And cringe whenever people quote Scarface to you.
In what world was that a Cuban accent?
20. Other Latinos may have a tough time understanding your accent in Spanish.
A consonant is just a suggestion.
21. You know that chisme is an artform.
It's not just "gossip." It's bonding.
22. And you can't make a point without talking with your hands.
Not all stereotypes are true, but... *accidentally knocks everything over while pantomiming.*
23. People will assume you have strong opinions about Pitbull.
Look, guys, he's not just Cuban. HE'S WORLDWIDE.
24. You exist in two worlds at once.
Fully American and fully Cuban, you might find that sometimes you feel like not enough of either. But that's OK. We're our own community with our very own identity. And that's pretty awesome.
