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21 Times “Fresh Off The Boat” Totally Nailed Having Immigrant Parents

Sleepovers? HA!

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1. The struggle of trying to respect your parents' native language

It's a good thought, but also ... ¿Coño, que clase de mierda es esto?

2. The reality that your parents are NOT your pals.

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They love you, yes, but they OWN YOU AND YOU SHOULD NEVER FORGET IT.

3. The pain of being the only kid at lunch with food like yours.

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And don't even think about trading stinky tofu, leftover boliche, or palak paneer for Lunchables, because your parents WILL KNOW.

4. The way your parents were so supportive of your extended family, and in no way competitive.

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(That was sarcasm. Also, your uncle is definitely lying about his car being new.)

5. ...Yup, not competitive at all. No such thing as the Best American Olympics.

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(More sarcasm.)

6. Your parents' ability to know a good bargain when they see one.

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Look, carving out a life in a new place costs money! Money that doesn't have to be wasted on ketchup packets or napkins.

7. The way your mom and dad tried to keep a positive outlook, but it was tough.

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Cue lots of comparisons to "well, in [home country], this would NEVER have happened."

8. Your grandmother was the boss.

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奶奶 Rules Everything Around Me

9. College wasn't just an expectation, but a MANDATE.

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How else are you going to be a doctor lawyer with seven kids and a mansion with a pool? Hello?!

10. How your parents constantly feared that you were slipping away from your culture.

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It's a real fear, but taking away video games and Spotify are NOT THE ANSWER.

11. ...Although they did try to understand the things you liked.

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Even your filthy taste in music.

12. And the (very few times) a family like yours appeared on TV, you gathered around to watch (and judge).

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Chico and The Man, ¿Qué Pasa, USA?, George Lopez, All-American Girl, The Kumars at No. 42, Fresh Off The Boat...

13. Report card time at your house meant STRESS and PRAYER.

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Remember: the "minus" in an "A minus" is a little knife piercing your parents' hearts.

14. The pressure from your parents to be THE BEST.

"Good" = "Not Best"

15. You grew up with two important lessons: 1) No sleepovers, and 2) eat, constantly.

"You have a bed at home!" + "Are you hungry? Eat something."

16. Your parents kept it 100 at all times, even when the truth hurt.

Your self-esteem as a growing child is important, sure, but so is not allowing you to live in a fantasy world.

17. Sure, sometimes you found your family's superstitions a little... questionable.

Whether it's fear of fours or wiping away bad vibes with an egg, these traditions likely felt both very familiar AND highly strange.

18. Nonetheless, you've found yourself slowly turning into your parents.

It's like Animorphing, only intead of turning into a squid or a bird, you turn into a woman who talks too loudly on cell phones and carries seventy-two napkins in her purse.

19. Your family basically never had time for other people's shit.

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Sorry, too busy trying to DO THE DAMN THING right now. *rolls up window*

20. Your parents adore you, but sometimes love meant "working a whole lot and not being able to spend time with you."

Life is full of sacrifices, especially when you're gaining a foothold in a new place.

21. And finally, you now understand that raising a family in a new place is hard, but your parents were pretty awesome at it.

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So: Thank you. Or whatever.

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