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73 Grown-Up Thoughts I Have While Fasting For Ramadan

To chai or not to chai, that is the question.

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7. GUGGGHHHH

8. Okay. OKAY.

9. I HAVE TO EAT SUHOOR.

10. But maybe I can nap for like five more min-

11. NO I HAVE TO WAKE UP.

12. I cannot believe it is 3:00 a.m.

13. I mean, mashallah, it is 3:00 a.m. I am so lucky to be fasting.

14. Seriously though, I should be thankful. I should be.

15. I am an adult now, so I should probably be eating healthy????

16. Salmon? Avocado? I am not ready for Ramadan.

17. I could stuff my face in a bowl of Honey Bunches of Oats and sleep????

18. Where is my dad to make me eggs Punjabi style?

19. I AM GROWN.

20. If I was home, I'd have leftover chicken tikka, which would burn a spicy hole in my stomach, but alas.

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21. To chai or not to chai, that is the (Ramadan) question.

22. Whether tis nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous caffeine headaches.

23. Did I drink enough water today??? - Muslims every day of Ramadan.

24. I drank too much water.

25. I can feel it sloshing in my stomach. It's almost Qur'anic flood levels of water in there.

26. Dear Allah, please forgive me.

27. Alright, I make the intention to keep this fast from 3:30 AM to 8:30 PM. And I'll try not to complain about it too much.

28. Did I really drink enough water?

29. Time for Fajr. Gotta get my center on.

30a. Pro of 3 a.m. wudu: Splashing water in your face wakes you up.

30b. Con of 3 a.m. wudu: Splashing water in your face wakes you up.

31. I knew Ramadan was eventually going to be in summer, but did I really understand?

32. Okay my nieces just sent me a Snapchat of them eating IHOP with their friends for suhoor. The game has changed.

33. These kids don't understand how good they have it. Mashallah though.

34. Does Taco Bell serve those new breakfast items at 3:30 a.m.?

35. Sleep in Ramadan is just a bunch of naps strung together by food.

36. Do I really have to go to work? I mean, really?

37. It's so easy to burn a whole day on the internet when you're fasting.

38. Zonnnnnnnnning out. Remember. This is only an upwards climb.

39. You learn to value every hour as precious when scraping for energy, food, sleep and spirituality.

40.Back when Ramadan was in winter, it was like a 9-5. Cha-ching. In and out. Summer's like NOT THIS MONTH, LIL BRO.

41. Ramadaaaaaaaaaan. Raaaaaaamadan. Ramaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaadan.

42. I get why people ask all these questions about Ramadan. It's pretty dang hardcore.

43. No, not even water.

44a. Me externally: Seriously, fasting is not that hard. You should try it.

44b. Me internally: screaming

45. People always be apologizing for eating in front of me. Son, I don't get mad at you for taking a nap when I haven't slept do I? Chillll.

46.So you fast from food and water?

Yeah.... and sex, I guess???

What do you mean "I guess?"

I mean I guess some people are not already fasting from sex.

47. The re-doing wudu for dhuhr and asr struggle is R E A L.

48. When I complain, I think about how the prophet LITERALLY LIVED A LIFE OF POVERTY IN THE DESERT and still fasted. Keeps things in perspective.

49. I love food but I'm not addicted to it. I hope.

50. Goddamn, the body is so efficient. It's been 15 hours without food or water and it's still chugging along

51. 10 a.m.: Today won't be so bad. That healthy breakfast did WONDERS for my energy levels. I'm such an adult.

6:15 p.m.: WELP, NAP TIME.

52: There is no bond between friends like the hangry Ramadan bond.

53. I am about as punctual as a walrus, but you best believe I'm breaking my fast at 8:33 p.m. on the dot.

54. My iftar date with a date is one date I'd never miss. Mostly because it's sunnah.

55. In 600-700 A.D., they did not have islamicfinder.org to let them know iftar time. And yet here I am acting like it's a damn race to break fast.

56. Adulthood is so cool because I don't HAVE to eat fried food for iftar.

57. That salad did not fill me at all so now I will eat ice cream. Ice. Cream.

58. You realize how addictive sugar is when you don't have any of it all day. I'm like a goddamn junkie for ice cream at iftar time.

59. So cool that there are people doing the same thing as me in Senegal, in Pakistan, in Japan, in Canada. Literally everywhere.

60. Okay now I need to NOT think about how delicious a Japanese iftar would be right now.

61. I should read more Qur'an. When I'm an adult, I'll plan better for that.

62. Oh my Allah, I'm 27 I'm an adult what am I doing

63. Hard for me to justify tarawih when I don't even pray five times a day. Inshallah one day I'll be better. Isha will do for now.

64. But then againnnn, I could just eat a bowl of cereal at midnight by myself, and sleep through fajr.

65. Buuuuuuut Netflix has missed me. Netflix is a Ramadan friend. Netfliiiiiix

66.I should really sleep now. Six hours is not a lot of time for food and rest.

67. I should stop complaining. I do love Ramadan and my community.

68. And anyway, your body gets used to it.

69. It's not the lack of food. It's the waiting that's hard.

70. One day, I will achieve the patience to stop complaining and finally do a fast right. But until then, its the struggle.

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73. I cannot believe it is 3:00 a.m. again.

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