The 40 Ways To Type Kisses, Defined

    The days of analysing his texts are OVER.

    1. x = I'm acknowledging that we are friends.

    2. X = I'M ACKNOWLEDGING THAT WE ARE FRIENDS.

    3. xx = I'm acknowledging that we are close friends.

    4. xxx = I have enjoyed our text exchange but I would like this conversation to end now.

    5. xxxx = It's clear that we don't share the same opinion here, and I think it would be better for everyone if we stopped texting each other now.

    6. xxxxx = I know you're going through a tough time, and I want you to know that I'm here for you.

    7. xxxxxxxx = I love you.

    8. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx = I LOVE YOU / I'm drunk.

    9. xxxxxx xx xxxxx xxxxx xxxxx = I LOVE YOU / I'm drunk / My autocorrect has grouped my kisses together, but whyyyyyy?

    10. Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx = I love everyone when I first meet them.

    11. XX = You've made some good points. But we don't really have anything else to talk about, byeeee.

    12. XXX = Sorry, Mum. I'll stop drunk texting you one day.

    13. XXXXXXXX = I know we're in a complicated place right now, but I don't see what harm can possibly come from meeting up part way through this very drunken night out. Amirite?

    14. x x = One day, we could be close. Right now, though, we're just two people who know each other.

    15. Xx = We are friends, but I'm lazy. I can't be bothered to make my kisses the same size, which would suggest that I can't be bothered to do lots of other things too. Don't come to me when your boyfriend breaks up with you and you need a shoulder to cry on because I'll be too busy to care. Sozbabes.

    16. xX = My kisses make no sense. Neither do I. You'll never understand me. No one does.

    17. xx xx xx = I'm pretty kooky. Spaces in-between kisses my new thing.

    18. xxx!xxxx1 jmxcczxzxxxxx = I'm unreasonably drunk. I'm going to keep texting you until you have sex with me.

    19. 8==:) = Someone has stolen my phone.

    20. c = I have an iPhone and I can't type.

    21. TX = I'm going through an indie phase.

    22. XT = I'm going through an identity crisis.

    23. T x = I've just got a new job and I'm trying out this sign off because I think it looks very professional.

    24. Tabatha = I think (hope) you've still got my number, but I'm signing my name because I can't deal with a "Sorry who is this??" text.

    25. XxX = I'm 12.

    26. XxXxXx = I'm reliving life as a 12-year-old. Life was so simple back then. Makes u think.

    27. ox = Hugs and kisses.

    28. ooxx = Suggestive cuddles and snogs.

    29. xoxo = I'm Gossip Girl.

    30. ooooooo = I need a hug.

    31. :) = I fancy you but I'm too shy to tell you.

    32. :) x = I fancy you but I'm too shy to tell you, so I'll hint at it instead.

    33. ;) = I'm the kind of girl your mother warned you about.

    34. :P = I can't bring myself to tell you I like you, but I can write code.

    35. cya = I struggle in social situations.

    36. KISSES = I told you I loved your skirt last week, when really it's the ugliest effing skirt I've ever seen.

    37. kiss kiss kiss = Hi, i'm your strange, foreign aunt. When are you coming to visit??????

    38. [no words]= I am very angry with you.

    39. NO KISS = I am pissed off with you, but it won't last.

    40. K. = Never going to happen. Never. Going. To. Happen.