23 Reasons Nothing In This World Is More Disgusting Than Fish

Fish is slimy. Fish is flaky. Sometimes you can see fish’s eyes. Eughhhhhhhhh. posted on

1. Look at this fish.

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2. Now look at its spine, which has been pulled out of its body and now lies to its side.

Flickr: rowdyrider / Creative Commons

3. Look at these fish bones, festering among the flesh that is still attached to them.

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4. Look at this head. This dead head swimming in the juices that its former fish body has leaked onto this plate.

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5. Look at this decapitated fish body.

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6. And imagine the man who has pulled these bones from his teeth BECAUSE THAT IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU EAT THE DEVIL’S FOOD.

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7. So many things about fish are gross. Namely, their gills and their fins and their eyes.

 

9. Which apparently your flatmates and your colleagues are immune to.

10. Unless they enjoy the stench of soggy, two-day-old, microwaved fish pie before 12 noon.

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11. Look at this tuna. This slimy tuna that has literally come from a tin, probably in one foul clump because that’s what tinned tuna does. This must be the most revolting thing on earth.

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12. Nope. Tuna steak. Tuna pate. TUNA CURRY. Those things are all worse.

 

13. But it’s not just tuna that is the problem. Posh fish is worse.

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GYRO PHOTOGRAPHY/amanaimagesRF / Thinkstock

 

But maybe you find the lingering taste of fish in the roof of your mouth that WILL PROBABLY NEVER LEAVE YOU somehow sophisticated. I DON’T KNOW.

14. But the worst fish is secret fish. Like the fish you get served in hors d’oevres, or the anchovies that reside under the cheese on a pizza, or the squid that looks like an onion ring.

 

15. And then everyone’s like, “Oh this isn’t a fishy fish, just try this fish, you’ll like this fish.” So you try their fish, but you don’t like their fish because, you know, it’s still fish.

16. LOADS OF FISH IS THE COLOUR OF YOUR GRANDMA’S CURTAINS, which is not a colour that things you eat should be (see: prawns, prawn cocktail and prawn cocktail crisps).

 

17. And when you’re a vegetarian, everyone’s like, “Oh, but you eat fish, right?” That is a very dumb question.

18. “But you must take Cod Liver Oil?” “OF COURSE NOT IT IS FISH OIL IN A CAPSULE WHY WOULD I EAT THAT?”

19. So, fellow citizens of the world. Let’s make a pledge. Let’s pledge never to eat small bodies that you have to pull apart while in company.

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20. Let’s never fry whole bodies and eat them as though consuming things like ovaries and bladders (which are all inside fried fish bodies) is normal.

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21. Let’s not eat them for breakfast…

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22. … and let’s never boil shelled fish because arghhhh gross.

Flickr: robertbanh / Creative Commons

23. And also sometimes when you’ve eaten battered fish there is some skin left behind ewwwwwwww.

Flickr: jemstone / Creative Commons

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