2. Be polite to everyone you meet.
… because no one likes to be yelled at.
4. Dubstep is important.
… especially when cats are involved.
5. Equal parts drama and generosity.
… because the Internet giveth and the Internet can taketh away.
6. Facebook is a scrapbook of your weird life.
… so post as much embarrassing things as possible.
9. If it’s on Wikipedia, double check the source.
… everyone knows Justin Bieber isn’t a squirrel in a blender.
10. Just turn your computer off sometimes.
… because there’s only so much trolling you can do in one night.
11. Katy Perry thinks you’re so gay.
… and don’t you forget it.
12. Looks Photoshopped? It probably is.
… even though he’s obviously playing guitar in the middle of the ocean, I’ve never seen a ship that big.
13. Meeting people online can be dangerous, so be careful.
… we’re not all models who smile at our laptops on couches made from imported Italian leather.
14. News travels incredibly fast.
… sometimes faster than the actual information. Looking at you, CNN.
16. People are probably tweeting from more bathrooms than you realize.
… don’t look at #pooptweet, just in case.
17. QWOP is amazingly difficult, so don’t even try.
… it’s probably not easier in real life, either.
18. Ryan Gosling is the hero America both wants and needs.
… who else would keep our streets safe from art thieves?
20. Tumblr supports pictures, so don’t get wordy.
… plus, no one reads your text posts anyways.
21. Understand that people are different.
… and the world will be a better place.
22. Violate every terms of service.
… especially if you’ve already agreed to them.
23. Wake up to this video every day.
… and you’re guaranteed to have no problems.
24. Xzibit is the most jolly of all the memes.
… and the most difficult meme to spell.
25. YouTube can teach you 200 things about the Internet.
… and also how to make funfetti brownies.