1. You've done this more than once.
when you try and kill a spider and he gets away
2. This is why you never saw the second Harry Potter movie.
Harry potter warnings: contains fantasy spiders
3. Despite Andrew Garfield's best efforts, you deeply mistrust Spider-Man.
4. You will never date anyone who's ever kept or sympathised with a tarantula.
5. Q: "What's the worst that could happen?" A: "IT COULD GET IN MY HAIR."
6. There is a designated spider-remover in your life.
7. There are two types of people in the world: the sort who won't chase you round the house shouting "ooh a spider", and those you should be legally able to kill.
8. You're never going to go camping.
9. Or to Australia.
10. The beach is safe, though. Apart from the sea spiders, I mean.
11. To see a spider is to lie awake for a week convincing it's somewhere about your person.
12. About once a day you go into cardiac arrest thinking a hairball is a spider.
13. People with long, thin fingers freak you out a bit.
14. Well, I guess you're not going to be eating crab anymore.
15. When you watch Alien movies, you're more terrified of the face-hugger than the xenomorph.
16. Sometimes you worry about what might happen if you ever encountered a spider while home alone.
17. You figure pretty much this.
18. Which is fine. You can change your name and move somewhere new. Your family will get over it eventually.
19. "It's more afraid of you than you are of it."
20. "Most spiders can't hurt you."
21. You can totally rationalise your hatred of spiders.
22. They have TOO MANY EYES.
23. Their legs are long and weird and alien and spindly.
24. Essentially, spiders embody lurking evil.
25. So obviously they need to be nuked from orbit.
26. It's the only way to be sure!
27. Fine. Maybe you can't rationalise your arachnophobia. But you still agree with this image.
fucking hate spiders
28. And identify with this cat.
I hate spiders
29. If you had been either of the girls here, you would have been two postcodes away by the end of the gif's rotation.
30. But at least there's one plus point to your deathly, crippling fear.
31. Ain't nobody faster than an arachnophobe who's just seen a spider.
