1. Hooray for Jedward, the funniest, most energetic, and most adorable act in pop today!
2. You see, when John and Edward Grimes from Dublin swaggered onto the X Factor stage in 2009, they made Simon Cowell do this:
3. But they made some of us do this:
8. Or the fact that they never, ever, ever jump at exactly the same time.
10. NOT TO MENTION THE FACT THAT they rock a mic like a vandal, light up the stage, and wax a chump like a candle.
Here is an important YouTube video, in case you don’t get the reference.
11. Also, they look unexpectedly chic in full-face makeup.
Mary-Kate and Ashley never looked this good.
12. And as BAFTAs.
16. In fact, Jedward are all business in the front…
17. … And party in the back.
18. Actually, they’re pretty much party all the time.
Look at them go. Boingggg!
19. Where do they get all that energy?
The fact that they will endorse almost anything for money?
Actually, no one really knows. Like black holes, dark matter and the double-slit experiment, what powers Jedward is one of the great mysteries of the universe.
20. Also, although they didn’t win Eurovision 2012, they were the most magnificent entrants.
21. And let’s not forget the fact that we still can’t quite get their 2011 Eurovision entry, Lipstick, out of our heads.
22. Despite being hypermegasuperstars, though, Jedward aren’t too good for Lidl.
Well, sort of.
26. And also someone saw fit to do a picture of them attacking a sort of defeated-looking unicorn.
Which is just the best idea ever.
28. And in the fact that, even though they may squabble…
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