Dear Men, Stop Shaving Your Pubes

Let’s end this once and for all.

1. Long ago, like 12 years ago, in the dreary days of Sisqo’s silver head, Ed Hardy, and Von Dutch trucker hats, a problematic trend began. This trend, a literal “pube killer,” became known as “manscaping.”

ID: 3443947

2. * Sounds the pube alarm *

ID: 3449809
Chris Ritter/BuzzFeed
ID: 3450698

4. Manscaping spread rapidly, almost like a deadly contagious virus comparable to the one on that dreaded poop cruise of 2013. It seemed like men everywhere were trimming, plucking, and, most unfortunately, de-pubing.

ID: 3449564

5. Scary thing is, it continues to this day.

ID: 3449744

6. Last week, we delved into the horrors of chest shaving. This week, we take a deeper dive. And by deeper dive, I mean pubes.

ID: 3443827

7. It’s time to stand up for the little guys (pubes).

ID: 3449930

8. Save the pubes.

ID: 3444300

9. Our campaign for pubes begins with the most obvious reason to keep them: There is something inherently humanly hot about a man with a natural body.

ID: 3444355

10. In layman’s terms, pubes are fucking hot.

ID: 3444885

11. Aesthetically speaking, they’re also charming. They add character. They are nice.

ID: 3444550

12. Another crucial role of pubes is that they accent the package. And by package, I’m talking dick. It just works.

ID: 3448956

13. There’s also science to back this up. Ever heard of pheromones? Sweet, sweet pheromones.

ID: 3449078

14. From my completely unscientific understanding, pheromones are like, to quote John Mayer (SORRY), sexual napalm.

ID: 3448914

15. Sweet, sweet, sexual napalm.

ID: 3449141

16. It must also be mentioned that we are in the midst of a “ORGANIC REVOLUTION.” All of our beauty products are natural, our food is natural, we fucking love natural.

ID: 3444476

17. This is why our bodies should remain intact.

ID: 3444785

18. Also I heard a rumor that every time you shave your pubes an angel dies of dysentery or something because it’s cold and your crotch is a barren wasteland of nothing.

ID: 3449318

19. Lastly, and most importantly, there is nothing more creepy than a man with a completely shaved crotch. You look like a puffy tween.

ID: 3444536

20. And I’ll be damned if every man looked like a puffy tween. The injustice.

ID: 3449373

21. I also have to add that razor burn is real! Rawness DOES happen. This is not pleasant.

ID: 3451053

22. And I GET IT, some people trim. You can do whatever the fuck you want to do with your body. I’m just advocating for pubes. It’s my job. It’s the right thing to do.

ID: 3444373

23. So what can you?

ID: 3450551

24. Value your pubes.

ID: 3449080

25. Keep your pubes.

ID: 3443830

26. Save your pubes.

ID: 3450770

27. Let the happy trails run long and far.

ID: 3450778

28. And end manscaping.

ID: 3451353

29. It’s a pube world, we’re just living in it.

Start a revolution and #savethepubes.

ID: 3450894

Check out more articles on!

  Your Reaction?


    Hot Buzz

    31 Reasons Potatoes Are The Best Thing At Thanksgiving


    17 Mind-Blowingly Delicious Noodles To Try In NYC


    Now Buzzing