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    24 Things No One Tells You About Becoming A Dad

    You're going to need to know this stuff before you're someone's old man.

    1. When you're out and about with your kid — but not your partner — someone will probably ask if you're "babysitting."

    2. Also, pretty women will smile at you a lot more than normal, but it's because of your kid.

    3. You shouldn't expect to immediately be a master at packing the car for family trips.

    4. You're going to get kicked in the balls... a lot.

    5. You will only fully understand how nasty men’s rooms are when you have to take your kid into one.

    6. You will also find it maddening how few men's rooms have changing tables.

    7. There is a very good chance you will be asked to dress up like a princess.

    8. You won't be immune to "onesie fever" just because you're a dude.

    9. Once you have kids, people will start calling all the same jokes you've always told "dad jokes."

    10. Also, your dancing will henceforth be forever referred to as "dad dancing."

    11. You will become the go-to person for dealing with all of the nasty stuff in your home.

    12. You will act silly with your kids in a way you would never act in front of any other human being.

    13. When you take your kid to a sporting event, you will spend no less than 40% of your time acquiring snacks and souvenirs for them.

    14. You will find talking to your friends without kids more difficult.

    15. You will throw your back out.

    16. Pretending to be interested when your kid talks about Minecraft will be one of your greatest challenges.

    17. You will develop an undeniable urge to troll your kids.

    18. "Daddy brain" is real.

    19. Your kids will more than likely trash one of your favorite possessions.

    20. You will revel in potty humor in a way you haven't since you were a kid yourself.

    21. You will accidentally hurt your kid and feel terrible.

    22. You will turn into your dad.

    23. You may develop a "beer belly," which more accurately could be described as a "beer/birthday cake/mac and cheese/leftover kid meal" belly.

    24. Lastly, no matter how hard you were before kids, you will forever have a soft spot once you're a dad.

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