1. When Binx says goodbye to Thora Birch in “Hocus Pocus.”
Technically, there’s nothing sexual going on between these two. But when Binx is transformed from an immortal black cat into a tweenage ghost, there’s something about this goodbye that brings on the longing sighs.
2. When Casper becomes a human again and does this to Christina Ricci.
As my colleague Erin pointed out, this entire scene was responsible for so many a young girl’s sexual awakening. Tru dat.
3. When Mimi-Siku offers this protective embrace to Leelee Sobieski in “Jungle 2 Jungle.”
Mimi-Siku was hot because he could totally defend you with a bow and arrow.
4. When Devon Sawa kisses Christina Ricci in “Now and Then.”
Now you’re like, Well, if she’s the first of the group to start hooking up, maybe it’s not such a bad thing that I’m into this.
5. The final scene of “My Girl 2.”
This isn’t just a kiss. Now you’re thinking, I want to be in a relationship where we touch each others’ cheeks.
6. The fish tank scene in “Romeo + Juliet.”
This is how you and your husband will meet.
7. Cher and Josh’s kiss in “Clueless.”
Because you desperately wanted your first kiss to be just like this. The perfect joking-around-but-he-takes-charge-and-just-fucking-does-it scenario.
8. The confusing relationship between Sara and the Goblin King in “Labyrinth.”
Here’s where things start to get darker. This is totally messed up because David Bowie is in love with a teenager and forcing her into uncomfortable scenarios. Basically, this is Fifty Shades of Grey for kids.
9. Then, when Leo and Claire begin their passionate affair in “Romeo + Juliet.”
What’s hot about this is that they’re teenagers. So…could something this sexy happen to you?
10. When Shakespeare undresses Gwyneth in “Shakespeare in Love.”
Thanks to the above, you’d totally bone Shakespeare.
11. OMG Ben Affleck puts an animal cracker in Liv Tyler’s underpants in “Armageddon.”
You can never look at a box of animal crackers the same way again.
12. The portrait scene in “Titanic.”
Oh godddd just paint me now, Leo. Paint meeeeee.
13. Jack and Rose. In the car. With the urge.
Ohmygod, just take me, Leo.
14. And then there was this sexy relationship in “Cruel Intentions.”
Which made you realize that being “bad” was actually djfpaodijfa;ldkjf.
15. But when Reese and Ryan do it in “Cruel Intentions,” it’s even hotter.
This is what your first time is going to be like, you tell yourself. (Until you actually do it for the first time. And it’s not at all like this. And actually, for the love of God will it ever be like this?)