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10 Movies I Wish I Hadn’t Seen With My Parents

Let’s go to the movies they said, it’ll be be fun they said. Here are 10 of my personal horrors - which family viewing do you wish you could erase from your memory?

10. Forgetting Sarah Marshall

My Mom Before: Oh that goofy guy from “How I Met Your Mother” made a movie!

My Mom During: OMG HE’S WAVING HIS DICK AT HER.
My Mom During: Children play with those chess sets….

9. 8 Mile

My Parents Before: A documentary about a historic rapper? Sounds promising.

My Parents During: NO NOT THE NICE GIRL FROM CLUELESS….you’re never allowed to listen to rap music again.

8. Borat

My Dad Before: So everyone’s talking about this cutting political parody called Borat?

My Dad During: Is he…touching…outside of Victoria’s Secret?

7. Hard Candy

My Parents Before: Oh hey we rented a movie that Juno’s in!

My Parents During: NO NO SHE IS A LITTLE GIRL TURN IT OFF

6. Titanic

My Parents Before: A historical love story that doomed from the start? What lovely cinematic adventure to go on!

My Parents During: OMG OMG COVER HER EYES SHE CAN’T SEE BOOBS SHE DOESN’T EVEN HAVE BOOBS YET.

5. Black Swan

My Mom Before: I hear it’s been nominated for and Oscar and that the dancing is stunning.

My Mom During: I AM NOT ENJOYING THIS.

4. Brokeback Mountian

My Dad Before: (flipping through channels on TV) Oh look that guy who plays a knight is now a cowboy.

My Dad During: (flips channel as fast as possible) So inappropriate….but not wrong, gay people are fine. Great even. Gays are…uh….just ask your Mom. And don’t Google it.

3. Team America: World Police

My Mom Before: Girls day! Let’s go see a movie - those South Park guys have a movie out right?

My Mom During: (gets up and leaves)

2. The American Pie Franchise

My Dad Before: What? You told me to rent a comedy.

My Dad During: If you ever make any of the same choices that these people have made, I will have failed as a human being.

1. Clerks 2

My Parents Before: Clerks? That’s about a bunch of nerds, right? and a comic book store? It’ll be funny let’s go.

My Parent During:…………What’s about to happen to that donkey?

Got one worse than any of these? Leave them in the comments!

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