19 Problems Only People With Straight Hair Will Understand

Cowlicks. Cowlicks everywhere.

1. If your hair is thick it’s basically unmanageable.

Thick hair has a mind of its own, and that mind is of a deranged lunatic that always wants you to look awful in pictures.

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2. If you have thin hair it just sits there, doing nothing.

“You want to get up today, hair? You maybe want to have some body or do ABSOLUTELY ANYTHING?”

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3. Short hair requires constant upkeep.

Shaved sides? Looks good for about a week until you turn into a fuzz monster. Which means if you want to keep that look, frequent cuts are required. Ain’t nobody have time for that!

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4. That windswept look sounds great in practice, but in reality…


Can you paint with all the colors of the wind, as it ravages your hair making you look like a walking bird’s nest? I can.

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5. Hoping your hair had ANY type of wave at all.

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“HAHAHAHAHA. No.” — Your roots.

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6. You have a bathroom graveyard of failed pomades, gels, waxes and hairsprays.

And all of them have “extreme hold” written on the side of them.

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7. Same goes for brushes and combs.

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And when you finally find one you like, you buy five just in case, y’know?

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8. You will always have one stray hair.

Never. Fails.

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9. Growing your hair long is frightening, because you’re concerned you may end up looking like this.

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And most likely will end up looking like this.

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10. Also, your growing out period seems to last forever.

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11. People who say you can “do anything” with your hair just don’t get it.

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If by “anything,” you mean uncontrollable chaos, then yes. Yes it can.

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12. Seeing someone with gorgeous straight hair drives you insane.


“Oh, this? I just got out of bed this way.”

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13. Having to straighten your already straight hair just so you can style it somehow.

“You do me first, then I’ll do you, ok?”

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14. Even when you curl your hair it never stays for long.

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That is what perms are for, and we’ve almost all tried them once.

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15. Bobby pins falling out on their accord.

They’re like, “Yeah, I know you need us right now but LATERZ!”

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16. Up-dos? More like up-don’ts.

You wanted that hour of work you did on your hair to only last five minutes, right?

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17. Not showering with straight hair means one express ticket on the Stringy Grease Train.

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18. Having to deal with ponytail dents.

It is literally like your hair is fighting back at you.

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19. You will have perfect hair days, and have no clue how to recreate them ever.

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At least you’ll have the memories!

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