17 Things Guys Secretly Love

Say it loud: “I like fancy soap, and I’m proud!”

1. Facial masks

Ladies, have you ever wondered why that jar of expensive facial clay you bought seems to run out quicker than you thought it should? Well, that’s because us dudes are sneaking in a little rejuvenating action when you’re not home. Spread it on, let it dry, wash it off, have a beer.

2. Reality shows

From House Hunters to Real Housewives, there is a reality show for every guy out there to watch, with or without the company of a woman.

3. Fancy soap

Why are all men’s soaps either something like “Mountain Breeze” or “Spring Fresh”? Why can’t we have lavender and mint? Or rosewater? If there is fancy soap in the shower or next to the sink you best believe we are using it and thinking, “You complete me, fancy soap.”

4. Fragrant candles

What’s so wrong with wanting your place to smell like fresh-baked cookies? Or like the lobby of a fancy hotel? Nothing, that’s what.

5. Romantic comedies

Paramount Pictures / Via foreveralonebutfab.com

OK, maybe not all of them, but there are a few that will give us a lump in our throats from time to time. Yeah, we may complain at first about their unrealistic expectations of love and corny dialogue, but by the end we are secretly thinking, “How can I be more like Paul Rudd?”

6. Women’s shampoo and conditioner

Like the facial masks and soaps, men will use the crap out of women’s expensive shampoo and conditioner if available. They smell 10 times better than anything we have available, plus, they usually come in those huge bottles so it’s harder to track how much we are actually using. A win-win if there ever was one.

7. Appletinis

The fact that any drink as strong as an Appletini can be described as “womanly” just because it is sweet is complete bullshit and, quite frankly, misogynistic. Yeah, they come with a cherry, but so does an Old Fashioned, which is considered a “manly” drink. Appletinis – and their cousin the Cosmopolitan – may be more drinkable than a scotch on the rocks, but that doesn’t make them any less potent or delicious.

8. Figure skating

NBC / Via thewire.com

And gymnastics. And competitive cheerleading. Actually, any sport that makes us go, “DAAAAAAAAAAMN!” we will enjoy, “girly” or not.

9. Bubble baths

Who doesn’t love a good bubble bath? Especially candlelit while drinking a glass of wine? Well, I know what I’m doing tonight.

10. Cute animals

Because look at it! What man doesn’t want to just snuggle with it and take naps together?!

11. Gossip magazines

How else are we supposed to find what stars are just like us?

12. Pink

Because as Aerosmith wrote:

“Pink it’s my new obsession/
Pink it’s not even a question,/
Pink on the lips of your lover,/ ‘cause
Pink is the love you discover”

13. Babies

Just because we may not be ready to have them doesn’t mean the cuteness factor of a baby goes unnoticed. And if you happen to be a man that is ready to have baby, good luck not feeling the explosion of your brovaries every time you see a newborn.

14. Hugs

Don’t act like a good hug doesn’t make you feel better, especially between bros.

15. Manicures and pedicures

Men have gross feet and hands, and like it just as much as you when they are not gross. Invite us next time you head to get a mani/pedi, because not only do we love to get our talons in check but we also love to gossip about your friend Carol. I mean, will she ever learn?

16. Cute tiny things

Usable? Not really. Cute as hell? Totally.

17. Female pop stars

Why does “Dark Horse” have to be my guilty pleasure? Why can’t I just like it? It’s time all men stood up and said, “I like female pop stars and their songs!” So, anyone want to karaoke “Party in the U.S.A.” with me?

Now get out there and live your life, men! It’s time to embrace your inner girl!

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