23 Reasons Why Being Single Is The Healthiest Thing For Your Soul

Just say no to Valentine’s Day.

1. Because no one should show their love for someone like this:

2. Because of people like Jeffrey:

3. Because you don’t have to deal with hard hitting questions like this:

4. Because it’s too difficult to come up comebacks this good 24/7:

5. And chances are you only have so many hot pics:

6. Because life is too short to have to deal with this much bread:

7. And this many cucumbers:

8. Do you really want to get notes like this all the time?

9. And do you REALLY want to be a planet? DO YOU?!

10. Because chances are if you’re dating someone named Barb Ell, you aren’t dating someone at all:

11. Because no one should share this much of their life with ANYBODY:

12. And no one should get a tattoo like this. NO ONE:

13. Because you can only compliment someone so much:

14. And you can only try to decipher flirting so much before losing your mind:

15. Because no one should have to deal with this many messages:

16. Or with self-described “lonely boners:”

17. Or people like this:

18. Because talking cute with someone can drive a person clinically insane:

19. And you shouldn’t have to spend all your free time Urkel-ing people:

20. Because Sonic should not be having your children:

21. And because you… uh… uhhhhhhh… nevermind:

22. Because the dark can be scary:

23. And finally, because of people like Corn Cobb:

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