Wow, it's like Us Weekly is giving you a belated birthday present! Hooking up with Brody Jenner would be like hooking up with Kristin Cavalleri, Lauren Conrad, Nicole Richie, and Lindsay Lohan at the SAME TIME! All we can say to the lucky winner is: wear protection.
Editorial note: Whoa! You've found a super-old post here on BuzzFeed, from an earlier era of the site. It doesn't really represent where we are anymore, and may in fact be totally broken, but we're leaving it up as a part of our early history.