Everything You Need To Know About The England Vs. Uruguay Match
Spoiler: may not have gone entirely as England hoped.
This was it. The crunch match. The match England had to win.

Everywhere was packed as the nation came out to watch the game.
Okay, some places weren't packed.
Village bar rammed for England game, haha.
Jessica Twentyman@jtwentymanFollow
Village bar rammed for England game, haha.
10:58 PM - 14 Jun 14RetweetFavorite
There was SO MUCH PATRIOTISM.
I AN WEARING ALL MY RED AND WHITE CLOTHES AT THE SAME TIME. #England
Louise Brealey@louisebrealeyFollow
I AN WEARING ALL MY RED AND WHITE CLOTHES AT THE SAME TIME. #England
6:32 PM - 19 Jun 14RetweetFavorite
Even Peter Andre.

Some people got religion.
C'mon #England #worldcup2014
Mark Robinson@robboma3Follow
C'mon #England #worldcup2014
6:10 PM - 12 Jun 14RetweetFavorite
We were reminded that England needed a win, and it didn't matter if it was ugly.
"This is not a beauty contest" - SCREW YOU, COMMENTATOR. I will watch this match however I please. #WorldCup
IncrediblyRich@IncrediblyRichFollow
"This is not a beauty contest" - SCREW YOU, COMMENTATOR. I will watch this match however I please. #WorldCup
8:00 PM - 19 Jun 14RetweetFavorite
The musical omens weren't good.
Uruguay's anthem is mad jaunty.
Eric Freeman@freemanericFollow
Uruguay's anthem is mad jaunty.
7:56 PM - 19 Jun 14RetweetFavorite
Our anthem always sounds like we know we're going to lose. Especially compared to that jaunty little Uruguayan number. #flenslens
Flenalty Shootout âš½ï¸@flendog_Follow
Our anthem always sounds like we know we're going to lose. Especially compared to that jaunty little Uruguayan number. #flenslens
7:59 PM - 19 Jun 14RetweetFavorite
It can't help our chances that every other country has a rousing or jaunty anthem and we have such a depressing lifeless dirge.
Gary@GaryTomWilliamsFollow
It can't help our chances that every other country has a rousing or jaunty anthem and we have such a depressing lifeless dirge.
7:59 PM - 19 Jun 14RetweetFavorite
Wayne Rooney narrowly missed a free kick...

...and everybody was all like this.

Except they weren't all dressed as crusaders.
Liverpool teammates Steven Gerrard and Luis Suarez were getting on really well.
Steven Gerrard goes into a challenge on Luis Suarez #LFC #ENG #URU #WorldCup http://t.co/jT9JMkpsL7
Goal Photos@GoalPhotosFollow
Steven Gerrard goes into a challenge on Luis Suarez #LFC #ENG #URU #WorldCup http://t.co/jT9JMkpsL7
8:15 PM - 19 Jun 14RetweetFavorite
It on! @luis16suarez vs Steven Gerrard. #ENG #URU #LFCworldcup
FIFA World Cup 2014@FastsportsHdFollow
It on! @luis16suarez vs Steven Gerrard. #ENG #URU #LFCworldcup
8:17 PM - 19 Jun 14RetweetFavorite
Joe Hart was a commanding presence in goal.
Joe Hart after a routine goalkick
NW3Gooner@NW3GoonerFollow
Joe Hart after a routine goalkick
8:19 PM - 19 Jun 14RetweetFavorite
It gradually became apparent that Uruguay were worryingly good at football.
Current feeling watching England... #WorldCup2014 #EnglandvsUruguay #England #WorldCup2014#Worldcup #football
Sam Donaldson@threecliffsgoldFollow
Current feeling watching England... #WorldCup2014 #EnglandvsUruguay #England #WorldCup2014#Worldcup #football
8:24 PM - 19 Jun 14RetweetFavorite
Important tactical questions were being asked.
ENGLAND whatchu gon do??!
Rihanna@rihannaFollow
ENGLAND whatchu gon do??!
8:23 PM - 19 Jun 14RetweetFavorite
Then Wayne Rooney rose majestically to... ah, shit.

Stupid crossbar.
And then... Suarez scored. Because of course.

I mean why would you mark Luis Suarez?
And everybody was all:
Amazing Twitter reaction to Suarez goal. My thanks to @capnbobfrapples, @rickharwood, @flashboy & @jamesdeer.
Chris Mann@digitalsausageFollow
Amazing Twitter reaction to Suarez goal. My thanks to @capnbobfrapples, @rickharwood, @flashboy & @jamesdeer.
8:44 PM - 19 Jun 14RetweetFavorite
People started getting... grumpy with some of the players.
Rooney heat map:
Cusack@CusxckFollow
Rooney heat map:
8:42 PM - 19 Jun 14RetweetFavorite
England were on the ropes. Half time couldn't come quickly enough.
Traditional half-time piss.
G10@_g10_Follow
Traditional half-time piss.
8:46 PM - 19 Jun 14RetweetFavorite
The deputy prime minister weighed in with a passionate, heartfelt tweet showing what a regular guy he is. Which went well.

Nick Clegg probably thinks England can lose and still become World Champions by joining forces with Germany.
Primly Stable@PrimlyStableFollow
Nick Clegg probably thinks England can lose and still become World Champions by joining forces with Germany.
9:02 PM - 19 Jun 14RetweetFavorite
The match restarted. Wayne Rooney continued not scoring goals.

We're going to be honest, we're not entirely sure what happened for the next twenty five minutes because we were watching through a haze of tears and beer.
This is painful enough to watch on Twitter. I hate to think what it's like in real life.
Mark Davies@markxdaviesFollow
This is painful enough to watch on Twitter. I hate to think what it's like in real life.
9:20 PM - 19 Jun 14RetweetFavorite
AND THEN IT HAPPENED. IT FINALLY HAPPENED. WAYNE ROONEY SCORED.

Exactly like everybody had predicted.
Always knew ROONEY would do it
Jak Fuller@JakFuller7Follow
Always knew ROONEY would do it
9:36 PM - 19 Jun 14RetweetFavorite
Because the nation always knew that Rooney had it in him - ahem
Rebecca Dougall@HeadRHSBathFollow
Because the nation always knew that Rooney had it in him - ahem
9:32 PM - 19 Jun 14RetweetFavorite
Always knew Rooney would score in the 75th minute
STEEZUS@yungareyanFollow
Always knew Rooney would score in the 75th minute
9:33 PM - 19 Jun 14RetweetFavorite
A nation dared to dream once more.
ENGLAND ARE DEFINITELY GOING TO WIN THE WORLD CUP.
James O'Malley@PsythorFollow
ENGLAND ARE DEFINITELY GOING TO WIN THE WORLD CUP.
9:31 PM - 19 Jun 14RetweetFavorite
...And then Suarez scored again or something.

Here’s what just happened.
Scott Bryan@scottygbFollow
Here’s what just happened.
9:42 PM - 19 Jun 14RetweetFavorite
And a nation went back to crying bitter salty tears.
Suarez have me like
Ry @FxckRy_Follow
Suarez have me like
9:40 PM - 19 Jun 14RetweetFavorite
So, yes. We lost. Again.
Roy Hodgson's all like...
Crap Taxidermy@CrapTaxidermyFollow
Roy Hodgson's all like...
9:41 PM - 19 Jun 14RetweetFavorite
Of course, there's still hope. England aren't technically out yet.
Mathematically England can still win if aliens abduct all the other teams. #WorldCup
paul bassett davies@thewritertypeFollow
Mathematically England can still win if aliens abduct all the other teams. #WorldCup
9:55 PM - 19 Jun 14RetweetFavorite
We just need this to happen:
If we beat Costa Rica i want a kiss,obviously on the cheek, from the UK Queen..
Mario Balotelli@FinallyMarioFollow
If we beat Costa Rica i want a kiss,obviously on the cheek, from the UK Queen.í ½í¸‚í ½í¸‚í ½í¸‚.
10:30 PM - 19 Jun 14RetweetFavorite
But we know what to do.
Right, shall we a get hammered then?
Carl Anka@Ankaman616Follow
Right, shall we a get hammered then?
9:55 PM - 19 Jun 14RetweetFavorite
And it's not like we ever really cared about football anyway.
Right. Cricket it is then.
Richie Firth@RichieFirthFollow
Right. Cricket it is then.
9:52 PM - 19 Jun 14RetweetFavorite