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    Posted on Sep 19, 2016

    21 Life Skills Every Brummie Has Mastered

    Knowing that Pip's Hot Sauce improves any meal.

    1. Squeezing these all over our Frankfurt Market bratwursts.

    Tom Cullen / Twitter: @ichoosemag

    Feeling like we're milking some sort of weird condiment cow and the entire city is watching.

    2. Being far too much of a coward to complain about the kids smoking on the 50 bus.

    Universal Pictures / Via

    Then complaining to anyone that'll listen the minute we're off it.

    3. Not having nightmares over our harrowingly real ice cream van warnings.

    Tom Cullen / Twitter: @ichoosemag

    ...Because it rhymes, right? Nothing scary can rhyme.

    4. Playing it real cool-like, when everyone says “PEAKY BLINDERS!” the moment you tell them where you’re from.

    Endemol UK

    That's right. We're in Tommy's army.

    5. Playing it equally cool over our incredible street art.

    Tom Cullen / Twitter: @ichoosemag

    "What, that old thing? That's been there forever."

    6. Knowing that Pip's Hot Sauce improves any meal.

    Facebook / Via Facebook: pipshotsauce

    No seriously, ANY meal. Even dessert.

    7. Knowing to avoid the M6 at all costs.

    Walt Disney Studios / Via

    "Go around it."

    "But that'll take 6 hours"

    "I said GO AROUND!!"

    8. But being able to traverse the Spaghetti Junction blindfolded.

    Flickr: katchooo / Creative Commons

    (Not literally)

    9. NEVER turning down a balti.

    10. Reacting accordingly every time we remember Cadbury's has been sold.

    Mashable / Via


    11. But also secretly still eating Dairy Milk when we think nobody's looking.

    12. Having the ability to hero worship the weirdest of places.

    13. Seriously. The weirdest places.

    14. Hiring a bike in no less than 106 easy steps.

    Tom Cullen / Twitter: @ichoosemag

    Step 1: Don't.

    15. Making sure our roads don't get too cocky.

    Tom Cullen / Twitter: @ichoosemag

    16. Coming up with greatest ideas for our old buildings.

    17. Then watching on helplessly as the council smashes them all to shit anyway.

    Ross Jukes Photography / Via

    18. We're good at letting people know about RAMP.

    Tom Cullen / Twitter: @ichoosemag


    19. Queuing for the Bullring escalator at Christmas a full month before we plan on getting to the top.

    Flickr: peter2010 / Creative Commons

    20. Loving the hell out of each other.

    21. And most importantly, we've stopped caring – I mean COMPLETELY STOPPED CARING – what the rest of the nation thinks of our city.

    Because it's our home. And we love it.

    Tom Cullen is the founder of "I Choose Birmingham", a free weekly email about the best things to do in Brum. Subscribe here.

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