I Illegally Smuggled Kinder Eggs From Canada So Americans Can Finally Try Them
"Maybe these are banned because they're a lot of fun."
If you didn't know, Kinder eggs are 100% banned in the United States.
Knowing this, I, Tanya Ch*n, recently smuggled a duffle bag of illegal Kinder eggs across the Canada–U.S. border. For this reason, my identity has been protected.*
Anyway, I broke the law so my poor American co-workers could finally experience a Kinder Surprise egg — something that's defined the childhoods of Canadians and non-Americans around the world.
They were excited, but a little trepidatious.
They were excited, but didn't know what to do with it.
Until Dave instinctively shoved the whole thing in his mouth... which is how it got banned in the first place, Dave.
(Meanwhile, those who opened it and ate it correctly were very impressed.)
Thankfully, Dave survived. Glad to still have you with us, Dave.
And left us with a very noble message about Kinder eggs and our freedoms.
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